Wednesday, August 24, 2011
Plant the Seeds of Love
In 1985 religionists and Bible scholars from all over the world met together at the Jesus Seminars to determine what Jesus really said. According to their research, Jesus never claimed to be the Messiah. Jesus never claimed to be the only son of God. He is just the most famous one to use the God Power within. Their findings can be found in THE FIVE GOSPELS. The truth is he taught that we are all sons and daughters of God. We are all made in the likeness of God. Jesus was a human who knew how to use the God inside and that was the message to his followers - to be God and live God. I believe the quote goes something like - "Greater things will you do than I . . . " We all have this God power to create good and love. It is impersonal and responds to our thoughts or prayers. Every thought is a prayer and every thought is creative. It also responds to negative thoughts and there are too many examples of people with bad thoughts getting what they want. The phrase "What Would Jesus Do?" can be changed to "What would God do or What would Love do?" The meaning is the same. The more we take control of our thoughts and think what we want in our lives, the more we "DO" what Jesus or God would do. It is up to us to plant good seeds or beautiful and loving ideas in the fertile soil of our brains.
Tuesday, July 26, 2011
July blog coming in the next few days
Just returned from a great spiritual experience with 350 teens in California. Watch for my experience soon.
Wednesday, June 22, 2011
In Memory of Special Friends
Another tragedy hit today. A friend from the past posted on Facebook that Ben Butler suddenly passed away. Ben and I had a close friendship and more back in the high school years. After my high school reunion, he wrote me here and we got caught up. He had gone to Oklahoma State University and then graduate school and was nearing his PhD in his field. He had been very successful since leaving Hugo, Oklahoma. I am saddened at this news.
I had received emails from him on the email connected to the blog. Over the weekend, I was at a training seminar in Philadelphia. We were asked to release anything that might be in the way of going forward during the weekend. The first thing that came into my mind was the grief I have had since January.
I last wrote for my blog on December 31, 2010 when my husband and I had returned to bury my sweet little pet, Precious after a Christmas visit with my son. I knew then that my friend Brenda, also a friend from Hugo, OK, was near her time to make her transition. Brenda died on January 11 from breast cancer and bone cancer. And my writing has been on hold since.
I get up each day and feel this underlying feeling of grief. I go on, but the hurt is still there churning and looking for sometimes very inconvenient times to rise to the surface. I would hear Brenda in my head telling me she would come around and drop in but only if I didn’t start crying. If I cried she would leave. It was comforting to feel her presence around and her beautiful laugh. But sometimes I have just had to go ahead and cry. I tried to put the grief aside on Friday night, but weepy and grief stricken feelings resurfaced in my dreams.
Sometimes, many times to be honest, I didn’t get up very easily. I am not one to get into depression and didn’t recognize it for a while. But it was what it was. I was depressed. I didn’t write on the blog. I didn’t write new stories or continue the stories I have started. Some people might call it a writer’s blog. I call it a time to heal losing the best friend I ever had.
I am very sad to hear of Ben’s death. He was 58 or 59 as he was a year behind me in school. He was a great football player in high school and a good saxophone player in band. And he was a friend. I am sad that Brenda and my little Precious are no longer here. But one of the phrases that is going into the end of one of my books is “Silly humans, there is no death!” Their Lights will shine on forever, for the soul, the Spirit of God, is infinite. I will never forget you my friends. As for me, it’s time to write again. I am back world!
I had received emails from him on the email connected to the blog. Over the weekend, I was at a training seminar in Philadelphia. We were asked to release anything that might be in the way of going forward during the weekend. The first thing that came into my mind was the grief I have had since January.
I last wrote for my blog on December 31, 2010 when my husband and I had returned to bury my sweet little pet, Precious after a Christmas visit with my son. I knew then that my friend Brenda, also a friend from Hugo, OK, was near her time to make her transition. Brenda died on January 11 from breast cancer and bone cancer. And my writing has been on hold since.
I get up each day and feel this underlying feeling of grief. I go on, but the hurt is still there churning and looking for sometimes very inconvenient times to rise to the surface. I would hear Brenda in my head telling me she would come around and drop in but only if I didn’t start crying. If I cried she would leave. It was comforting to feel her presence around and her beautiful laugh. But sometimes I have just had to go ahead and cry. I tried to put the grief aside on Friday night, but weepy and grief stricken feelings resurfaced in my dreams.
Sometimes, many times to be honest, I didn’t get up very easily. I am not one to get into depression and didn’t recognize it for a while. But it was what it was. I was depressed. I didn’t write on the blog. I didn’t write new stories or continue the stories I have started. Some people might call it a writer’s blog. I call it a time to heal losing the best friend I ever had.
I am very sad to hear of Ben’s death. He was 58 or 59 as he was a year behind me in school. He was a great football player in high school and a good saxophone player in band. And he was a friend. I am sad that Brenda and my little Precious are no longer here. But one of the phrases that is going into the end of one of my books is “Silly humans, there is no death!” Their Lights will shine on forever, for the soul, the Spirit of God, is infinite. I will never forget you my friends. As for me, it’s time to write again. I am back world!
Friday, December 31, 2010
The Story of Precious
As 2010 draws to a close, I decided to check in on the blog and my emails that come through this address. It’s been a while since I posted. So much has been happening and so little at the same time. Our landscape business has been good and then not good. Winter is usually challenging but we are holding on. When I am trying to keep a positive attitude, I don’t write as much, well not the kinds of things I write here but as I checked in, I found some really good messages from a certain writer I know – me! I reminded myself what I need to do when things are getting a bit too challenging.
For instance, I am going through some grief again. At this point I do not know if my closest friend is still with us. The last time I talked to her brother, they were taking it one day at a time. She has been fighting the fight against both breast cancer and bone cancer. After several different round of treatments she had decided to stop. I was away in Santa Fe for a week with my son and his girlfriend. I had called and spoken with her son once and her brother another time. Then I just didn’t want to know if the news was not good. And another matter that I wanted to avoid was happening too.
Thirteen and a half years ago, the family went to Kansas. We had Autumn who had 4 kittens and her feral mother, Monique mostly living on our front porch. We had a friend who was coming by to feed the cats and dogs and check on them. They were happier staying at home. Besides, no one could touch Monique and she was only inside with Autumn to protect and help with her kittens. Monique was a strange little cat. It felt like she had been tame at some point but abused severely. She couldn’t meow and as long as we didn’t try to touch her, she seemed okay closed inside the porch.
Monique looked like a British Short Hair variety – black, average body, with short legs and pointed feet. The day after we left for our trip, Monique had 4 kittens herself but the person taking care of her had no idea. She had them well hidden under the porch and not being able to get close to her, he didn’t realize that her body shape had changed from a little round tummy to a flat tummy.
Monique had been having two litters of kittens a year under our house. The first litter never appeared. When she would finally appear after the second litter, she would only have one kitten. The last was Autumn. Autumn was feral at first but it turned out her daddy was a Maine Coon and they just aren’t wild. We eventually got Autumn to let us handle her and then she went into heat and had 4 orange male kittens. The sire of her kittens was there. He was wild too and was waiting to kill the male kittens. Monique seemed to have had it happen before and she stayed right there ready to fight him if he came too close. When we boxed up Autumn and the newly born kittens to move her inside, Monique got in the box too. And that is how we got her to move inside, not knowing that she was pregnant too.
Her four kittens all looked like Siamese cats. We had noticed when she was in season that she liked to wait for this big Tom that looked Siamese. We called him Big Daddy. He wasn’t full blood because he had a very square looking head – not a true Siamese. But his colors and her body shape made for 4 apple headed kittens with seal points. Only one was male and he had some longer hair. Sadly, the long hair attracted fleas terribly and under the porch was not a very good environment. He began to fail. She didn’t know how to help him and she stopped nursing him. The 3 females were getting weaker too. I tried to help him. He was a fighter but he just couldn’t make it. Then the second one went. She was a beautiful one with huge eyes and more of a lilac point. A lady came along and wanted to try to save the largest one. It wasn’t a good idea but I wasn’t having any luck. I took the last one to the vet. He said she had flea anemia but if I could keep her alive for 48 hours, she would make it.
I kept her in a tiny shoebox by my face in the bed. I combed off the fleas as much as possible. I used an eyedropper and fed her formula with Super Blue Green algae and an egg in it. I would take her out to Monique but the mother wouldn’t try to nurse her for a while. She and Autumn would wash and massage her down and I would take her back inside and give her a couple of drops every hour or two. After a few hours and staying up all night – I felt like I did when my children were keeping me up all night – her tongue began to get some color in it again. Once she made it through the crisis, her mom began to nurse her again.
We could assume that what had been happening with Monique each year was that as a wild cat she had to leave her kittens to find food. Either the tomcats or other predators, like under the house rats, were getting her kittens. She would immediately go into heat again having the second litter in June each year. The fleas under the house in the dirt from the wild critters were getting her second litter. She would manage to save one. The one we helped her save became Precious. Precious was my baby and she considered me her mother. I had decided if I could catch Monique, I would get her spayed and after recovery let her continue to live under my house as a feral – but spayed – cat. Precious was going to be 8 weeks old on Monday. The flea anemia had slowed her growth but she was eating solid food. On Friday morning I went out to the porch to greet the cats as I always did and found Monique had died. I didn’t know why. “Doug, Monique is dead!” A strange little cat that was very intelligent had come and given us Autumn and Precious (and Chang, our other cat) and then she was gone.
Precious was a very sweet cat. She was a little slow. We attributed it to the lack of oxygen to her brain when she was little. She had tiny short legs like her mother and a small head but she got fat even before she was spayed. After the operation, she got even fatter. She was shaped like a basketball with legs. For many years she was good friends with Scully, another cat who decided to come live with us. We didn’t get Scully and Precious spayed for a long time finding out that if you don’t let them breed, they can get very sick. So when we had to spay Scully in an emergency we decided that we should take care of Precious too. The vet came back and said that Precious had some tumors and she wanted to send some tissues of to be tested. That would be another $60. I said, “No, if Precious gets worse, I will put her down. I won’t put her through expensive cancer treatment that may or may not work. Precious seems to be fine for now and we will take it one day at a time.”
After their surgeries, Scully wouldn’t have anything to do with the other cats. She was content being alone. Precious always needed to be close to another animal. She was tolerated by Chang who lived separately in the back of the house and sometimes she would spend time with him. We had and have a white dove. Precious seemed to think that bird was hers. After a few years we began to let Chang go outside. Precious would want to go and would follow him around doing what he did. In 2008, Chang stopped eating and then stopped drinking water. The vets don’t really know what causes this ailment and can only treated it with cortisone shots, steroids. After a while they don’t work anymore and the cats just waste away. I call it the wasting disease. Chang died on Memorial Day. Precious then decided to attach to out current dog, Sukie. Precious did not know she was a cat, did not know she wasn’t human, and certainly did not know that there was a difference in cats and dogs. Sukie is a sweetheart. They became close friends.
A few weeks ago 13 year old and 5 months Precious seemed to have had a stroke. I had a dog that had a stroke at 16 years old. He had one in the morning and by night had the second and died in my arms. I expected Precious would have another within 24 hours but she didn’t. In fact, she seemed to recover. She gradually got to where she could walk again, even jump and get in a chair (though getting down she kind of fell on her face), and was walking and running normally. She was eating somewhat normally and drinking water. Getting in and out of the litter box was a little difficult. Soon she began to get litter clumped up on her feet. I figured out that she was urinating on her feet or down her legs.
We had planned our trip to Santa Fe for Christmas. Precious began to show the symptoms of the wasting disease. I knew the vets were expensive and could only offer a cortisone shot. But I couldn’t cancel the trip. We had our friend Buzz to stay at the house but when we left I was very concerned that Precious was not going to be here when we returned. On Monday, Dec 27, Buzz called. She seemed to have had another stroke and was not able to walk on Sunday. When he got up, our sweet little precious Precious had left us. I had to come home to her not being here ever again.
I believe she lives on but her physical presence is missed. Sukie keeps looking for her like she did when Chang died. The other cats are trying but they just aren’t my baby girl Precious. She was a cute cat and 100% unconditional love. So here I honor and praise what she gave us. I love you Precious. I am sorry I could not fix the problem. Please forgive me. Thank you for all the love and joy you gave us and for just being you. Rest in Peace my little one. We miss your presence though I know you are wondering around here wanting me to pick you up. It’s a new relationship and eventually you will find you must go someplace else. You will always be welcome here though if you want to drop in from time to time.
For instance, I am going through some grief again. At this point I do not know if my closest friend is still with us. The last time I talked to her brother, they were taking it one day at a time. She has been fighting the fight against both breast cancer and bone cancer. After several different round of treatments she had decided to stop. I was away in Santa Fe for a week with my son and his girlfriend. I had called and spoken with her son once and her brother another time. Then I just didn’t want to know if the news was not good. And another matter that I wanted to avoid was happening too.
Thirteen and a half years ago, the family went to Kansas. We had Autumn who had 4 kittens and her feral mother, Monique mostly living on our front porch. We had a friend who was coming by to feed the cats and dogs and check on them. They were happier staying at home. Besides, no one could touch Monique and she was only inside with Autumn to protect and help with her kittens. Monique was a strange little cat. It felt like she had been tame at some point but abused severely. She couldn’t meow and as long as we didn’t try to touch her, she seemed okay closed inside the porch.
Monique looked like a British Short Hair variety – black, average body, with short legs and pointed feet. The day after we left for our trip, Monique had 4 kittens herself but the person taking care of her had no idea. She had them well hidden under the porch and not being able to get close to her, he didn’t realize that her body shape had changed from a little round tummy to a flat tummy.
Monique had been having two litters of kittens a year under our house. The first litter never appeared. When she would finally appear after the second litter, she would only have one kitten. The last was Autumn. Autumn was feral at first but it turned out her daddy was a Maine Coon and they just aren’t wild. We eventually got Autumn to let us handle her and then she went into heat and had 4 orange male kittens. The sire of her kittens was there. He was wild too and was waiting to kill the male kittens. Monique seemed to have had it happen before and she stayed right there ready to fight him if he came too close. When we boxed up Autumn and the newly born kittens to move her inside, Monique got in the box too. And that is how we got her to move inside, not knowing that she was pregnant too.
Her four kittens all looked like Siamese cats. We had noticed when she was in season that she liked to wait for this big Tom that looked Siamese. We called him Big Daddy. He wasn’t full blood because he had a very square looking head – not a true Siamese. But his colors and her body shape made for 4 apple headed kittens with seal points. Only one was male and he had some longer hair. Sadly, the long hair attracted fleas terribly and under the porch was not a very good environment. He began to fail. She didn’t know how to help him and she stopped nursing him. The 3 females were getting weaker too. I tried to help him. He was a fighter but he just couldn’t make it. Then the second one went. She was a beautiful one with huge eyes and more of a lilac point. A lady came along and wanted to try to save the largest one. It wasn’t a good idea but I wasn’t having any luck. I took the last one to the vet. He said she had flea anemia but if I could keep her alive for 48 hours, she would make it.
I kept her in a tiny shoebox by my face in the bed. I combed off the fleas as much as possible. I used an eyedropper and fed her formula with Super Blue Green algae and an egg in it. I would take her out to Monique but the mother wouldn’t try to nurse her for a while. She and Autumn would wash and massage her down and I would take her back inside and give her a couple of drops every hour or two. After a few hours and staying up all night – I felt like I did when my children were keeping me up all night – her tongue began to get some color in it again. Once she made it through the crisis, her mom began to nurse her again.
We could assume that what had been happening with Monique each year was that as a wild cat she had to leave her kittens to find food. Either the tomcats or other predators, like under the house rats, were getting her kittens. She would immediately go into heat again having the second litter in June each year. The fleas under the house in the dirt from the wild critters were getting her second litter. She would manage to save one. The one we helped her save became Precious. Precious was my baby and she considered me her mother. I had decided if I could catch Monique, I would get her spayed and after recovery let her continue to live under my house as a feral – but spayed – cat. Precious was going to be 8 weeks old on Monday. The flea anemia had slowed her growth but she was eating solid food. On Friday morning I went out to the porch to greet the cats as I always did and found Monique had died. I didn’t know why. “Doug, Monique is dead!” A strange little cat that was very intelligent had come and given us Autumn and Precious (and Chang, our other cat) and then she was gone.
Precious was a very sweet cat. She was a little slow. We attributed it to the lack of oxygen to her brain when she was little. She had tiny short legs like her mother and a small head but she got fat even before she was spayed. After the operation, she got even fatter. She was shaped like a basketball with legs. For many years she was good friends with Scully, another cat who decided to come live with us. We didn’t get Scully and Precious spayed for a long time finding out that if you don’t let them breed, they can get very sick. So when we had to spay Scully in an emergency we decided that we should take care of Precious too. The vet came back and said that Precious had some tumors and she wanted to send some tissues of to be tested. That would be another $60. I said, “No, if Precious gets worse, I will put her down. I won’t put her through expensive cancer treatment that may or may not work. Precious seems to be fine for now and we will take it one day at a time.”
After their surgeries, Scully wouldn’t have anything to do with the other cats. She was content being alone. Precious always needed to be close to another animal. She was tolerated by Chang who lived separately in the back of the house and sometimes she would spend time with him. We had and have a white dove. Precious seemed to think that bird was hers. After a few years we began to let Chang go outside. Precious would want to go and would follow him around doing what he did. In 2008, Chang stopped eating and then stopped drinking water. The vets don’t really know what causes this ailment and can only treated it with cortisone shots, steroids. After a while they don’t work anymore and the cats just waste away. I call it the wasting disease. Chang died on Memorial Day. Precious then decided to attach to out current dog, Sukie. Precious did not know she was a cat, did not know she wasn’t human, and certainly did not know that there was a difference in cats and dogs. Sukie is a sweetheart. They became close friends.
A few weeks ago 13 year old and 5 months Precious seemed to have had a stroke. I had a dog that had a stroke at 16 years old. He had one in the morning and by night had the second and died in my arms. I expected Precious would have another within 24 hours but she didn’t. In fact, she seemed to recover. She gradually got to where she could walk again, even jump and get in a chair (though getting down she kind of fell on her face), and was walking and running normally. She was eating somewhat normally and drinking water. Getting in and out of the litter box was a little difficult. Soon she began to get litter clumped up on her feet. I figured out that she was urinating on her feet or down her legs.
We had planned our trip to Santa Fe for Christmas. Precious began to show the symptoms of the wasting disease. I knew the vets were expensive and could only offer a cortisone shot. But I couldn’t cancel the trip. We had our friend Buzz to stay at the house but when we left I was very concerned that Precious was not going to be here when we returned. On Monday, Dec 27, Buzz called. She seemed to have had another stroke and was not able to walk on Sunday. When he got up, our sweet little precious Precious had left us. I had to come home to her not being here ever again.
I believe she lives on but her physical presence is missed. Sukie keeps looking for her like she did when Chang died. The other cats are trying but they just aren’t my baby girl Precious. She was a cute cat and 100% unconditional love. So here I honor and praise what she gave us. I love you Precious. I am sorry I could not fix the problem. Please forgive me. Thank you for all the love and joy you gave us and for just being you. Rest in Peace my little one. We miss your presence though I know you are wondering around here wanting me to pick you up. It’s a new relationship and eventually you will find you must go someplace else. You will always be welcome here though if you want to drop in from time to time.
Monday, September 6, 2010
Who am I today?
September 6, 2010
Who am I today?
Not much has changed since last year as far as who I am and yet in some ways I change every day. Many people I know spent the high school years partying with alcohol and maybe some pot and having sex. For many the way to have fun is still to drink, smoke pot, pig out, and have sex. They are the same now as in high school. It seems a lot of them sadly have drank themselves into early graves.
The ones that went to college probably did the drinking and having sex too in greater degree. What the ones who didn’t go to college don’t know is that what they did in high school is pale compared to what the rest of us did in college. We all went through some sort of rights of passage just at different stages. We sowed our wild oats too.
Others had fun in other ways in high school – skipping class, doing somewhat stupid things, rebelling against authority in some way from breaking simple rules to breaking the law. The fun was in taking the risk, doing something daring. It was another expression of self-hood, another right of passage.
Unfortunately some of those who always followed the rules and always did what their parents told them may have passed away already at young ages. They never broke free of the invisible limitations that they grew up with. They never discovered their true self and lived. They died of broken hearts.
Some had inner peace when they were children and just seemed to be born knowing how to be happy. Those are the ones at the high school reunions that look like they are 18 while the rest of us look our age. They just always knew something that the rest of us have spent our adult lives trying to figure out.
And then others did the party thing for a while but have returned to their conservative upbringings – not drinking or doing drugs, not fooling around, and going to a church that fits their lives now whether it was the childhood church or perhaps they have ventured out so far as to change religions even though they approach them the same way their parents did the old church.
Who is Katherine Wheelus Dannels then? Well, I had my wild times when I was in college. I continued after college living the single life and ventured out across country to Sarasota, FL. I did my drinking at OU and some the first few years in Florida but gradually decided that I didn’t need alcohol to have fun. Even wine gives me an instant stomachache and sends me to the bathroom.
I explored many spiritual thoughts and ideas. I was a probation counselor for teens for a few years and then decided to go back to school to get a Master’s degree. Then I met my now husband and when I moved to Georgia, he followed. A few months later we married – almost 31 years ago.
There have been many divorces and remarrying in my high school class. There have been many very successful classmates. Many are busy with full lives and don’t communicate with the rest of the class. Others have stayed married but there have been infidelities and almost divorces. Others of us have struggled financially. We have all had our challenges.
NONE of the past shenanigans matters in the greater picture of life. The person I was in high school was very critical and judgmental. Many classmates know how my mom could be and I came by it naturally. But many others know the gentle loving man my father was. He had simple tastes and interests but his general philosophy was to live his own life and not look for negatives about others. If he made a comment about someone that seemed critical it was more of an observation, just a comment and not being mean. You could disagree with him and he wouldn’t get offended. He didn’t try to force others to have the same opinion as him.
My philosophy is to find the good in every situation. If it is challenging I see what I can learn from it. I believe where thought goes energy flows and that all thought is creative. I work on my thoughts all the time especially when my husband is being a typical Gemini. I enjoy walking in nature for fun and talking with one or two friends. I like to be around other like-minded people that want to enjoy life. I also like to be alone and quiet – a lot! I tend to shy away from people that complain, find things to criticize, and want to project their beliefs on the world. Now I am not immune to getting on my soapbox about certain things. I think life is to be enjoyed and that what we eat and think contributes to the way life is. Eating a standard American diet shortens life and ends up making a person dependent on medicines just to live, much less live happily.
If we are bitching all the time, we are putting energy into the things we are complaining about. I’d rather create beauty. I don’t do well with people who have nothing to do but hate and find fault, complain, and gossip. A wise young mother of ten said, “Have ten kids and you won’t have time to gossip.” I didn’t have to have that many children to find life is too short to waste it putting others down and judging them when I don’t know anything about their lives, or even if I do. Who am I to proclaim I KNOW how they should live their lives. I also know and believe that if there is something about someone else that is “pushing my buttons” I am projecting my own issues out and I need to go look in the mirror.
Whatever works for another person is all that matters. We are all doing the best we can to make it in the world. Life is beautiful one step at a time.
Who am I today?
Not much has changed since last year as far as who I am and yet in some ways I change every day. Many people I know spent the high school years partying with alcohol and maybe some pot and having sex. For many the way to have fun is still to drink, smoke pot, pig out, and have sex. They are the same now as in high school. It seems a lot of them sadly have drank themselves into early graves.
The ones that went to college probably did the drinking and having sex too in greater degree. What the ones who didn’t go to college don’t know is that what they did in high school is pale compared to what the rest of us did in college. We all went through some sort of rights of passage just at different stages. We sowed our wild oats too.
Others had fun in other ways in high school – skipping class, doing somewhat stupid things, rebelling against authority in some way from breaking simple rules to breaking the law. The fun was in taking the risk, doing something daring. It was another expression of self-hood, another right of passage.
Unfortunately some of those who always followed the rules and always did what their parents told them may have passed away already at young ages. They never broke free of the invisible limitations that they grew up with. They never discovered their true self and lived. They died of broken hearts.
Some had inner peace when they were children and just seemed to be born knowing how to be happy. Those are the ones at the high school reunions that look like they are 18 while the rest of us look our age. They just always knew something that the rest of us have spent our adult lives trying to figure out.
And then others did the party thing for a while but have returned to their conservative upbringings – not drinking or doing drugs, not fooling around, and going to a church that fits their lives now whether it was the childhood church or perhaps they have ventured out so far as to change religions even though they approach them the same way their parents did the old church.
Who is Katherine Wheelus Dannels then? Well, I had my wild times when I was in college. I continued after college living the single life and ventured out across country to Sarasota, FL. I did my drinking at OU and some the first few years in Florida but gradually decided that I didn’t need alcohol to have fun. Even wine gives me an instant stomachache and sends me to the bathroom.
I explored many spiritual thoughts and ideas. I was a probation counselor for teens for a few years and then decided to go back to school to get a Master’s degree. Then I met my now husband and when I moved to Georgia, he followed. A few months later we married – almost 31 years ago.
There have been many divorces and remarrying in my high school class. There have been many very successful classmates. Many are busy with full lives and don’t communicate with the rest of the class. Others have stayed married but there have been infidelities and almost divorces. Others of us have struggled financially. We have all had our challenges.
NONE of the past shenanigans matters in the greater picture of life. The person I was in high school was very critical and judgmental. Many classmates know how my mom could be and I came by it naturally. But many others know the gentle loving man my father was. He had simple tastes and interests but his general philosophy was to live his own life and not look for negatives about others. If he made a comment about someone that seemed critical it was more of an observation, just a comment and not being mean. You could disagree with him and he wouldn’t get offended. He didn’t try to force others to have the same opinion as him.
My philosophy is to find the good in every situation. If it is challenging I see what I can learn from it. I believe where thought goes energy flows and that all thought is creative. I work on my thoughts all the time especially when my husband is being a typical Gemini. I enjoy walking in nature for fun and talking with one or two friends. I like to be around other like-minded people that want to enjoy life. I also like to be alone and quiet – a lot! I tend to shy away from people that complain, find things to criticize, and want to project their beliefs on the world. Now I am not immune to getting on my soapbox about certain things. I think life is to be enjoyed and that what we eat and think contributes to the way life is. Eating a standard American diet shortens life and ends up making a person dependent on medicines just to live, much less live happily.
If we are bitching all the time, we are putting energy into the things we are complaining about. I’d rather create beauty. I don’t do well with people who have nothing to do but hate and find fault, complain, and gossip. A wise young mother of ten said, “Have ten kids and you won’t have time to gossip.” I didn’t have to have that many children to find life is too short to waste it putting others down and judging them when I don’t know anything about their lives, or even if I do. Who am I to proclaim I KNOW how they should live their lives. I also know and believe that if there is something about someone else that is “pushing my buttons” I am projecting my own issues out and I need to go look in the mirror.
Whatever works for another person is all that matters. We are all doing the best we can to make it in the world. Life is beautiful one step at a time.
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
Random thoughts for Aug 31, 2010
It is the end of August and in a way, the end of the summer. It has been one of ups and downs, rain and very hot weather. There have been joys - seeing and spending time with my oldest son last week and my daughter the end of June. We built a natural swimming pool/pond and did very well. Then the hot weather hit and there wasn't much landscaping going on. We took some time off to visit my mother-in-law for her birthday and my father-in-law's birthday, Aug 20 and Aug 18 - 2 Leos that like to be the center of attention even at 80 and 82. It's no wonder they divorced 37 years ago.
Kansas provided nature at its finest with swarms of thousands of dragon flies, butterflies of all colors, grasshoppers flying in your mouth, praying mantises in abundance, cicadas keeping you awake on the warm nights, gold finches, night hawks, and blackbirds, and a parent coyote giving the pups a singing lesson on full moon night. Sunsets were varied and beautiful as usual. We tried to stay up many nights in a row to see the full moon next to Mars - no Venus - no Saturn - no the last official claim was Jupiter. I lost track of which one it actually was. On Thursday night it was supposed to be the biggest. I stayed up. It got to a certain point in the sky and then they started moving across the sky in the same position - it never got close. Then someone said the idea that it was going to be as big as the moon was an Internet hoax. On the other side of the sky Mars, Venus, and Saturn were almost lined up and bigger than Jupiter. But the night sky was full of stars and clarity. We saw something move across the sky several nights in a row that kind of bounced around with one big white light. We have noticed this before in Kansas. It doesn't move like an airplanes and they moved across the sky in opposite directions as the strange light. The airplanes usually have 3 lights, a red, a green and one white - not as big as the bouncy thing. We always end up wondering if our eyes are playing tricks on us when it starts bouncing around.
It was good (sort of) to see the family. The dynamics were the same BS and several people make no effort the have a better idea. In the midst of all of that, as I was able to get online, I found out that a high school classmate had passed away suddenly. He regularly posted on the class website funny stories and was in his own way quite a writer. (See previous post.) Before my trip I learned that my favorite published writer, Ted Andrews had passed away last October. I was very sad at the news of both of these men about my age.
I found myself screaming inside "Life is too short and can end without a warning for all of this childish petty bickering. Yes, all the drama gives you something interesting and different to listen to but find some joy to focus on and some love - if nothing else the beauty of the land!" But it isn't my place to judge or to tell others how to live their lives. I found myself increasingly hiding away in our little vacation like house and riding alone on the red 4-wheeler to the farm. It was fun except when that white pick-up truck would come flying down the dirt road and I would eat limestone gravel dust for five minutes. One day I put on sunblock before I took off for my ride - I had arms that looked like they had a coat of concrete on them after the dust from the trucks.
I am back in Georgia now. My 14 plus year old cat, Autumn just came by for a little holding - she doesn't like holding very often - and her kisses on the top of her head. She gave me some smiles and licked my hand and now she is washing me off of her. But that is Autumn. Zeus and Oden are more affectionate than usual and Precious is her usual hug me self. The dog is still mad at me and not eating yet. She does this for a few days when I leave her - though Buzz stayed here and she wasn't alone. She just has such a good pout when I displease her. When the act doesn't get anywhere she eats all of her food as long as no one is looking.
So life goes on. I choose to see the beauty and enjoy it. I want to make some changes and my husband and I want to produce income in more consistent ways. There are things we want to do and places we want to go. I look at it this way. If life as we know it is going to end in 2012, then let's live it up. Who knows what kind of life we will end up in next time? I choose to believe in moving forward to a new and better idea - right now right this minute. It is all good and all God. There is only One Power and I choose to use it for happiness. Katherine Ari
Kansas provided nature at its finest with swarms of thousands of dragon flies, butterflies of all colors, grasshoppers flying in your mouth, praying mantises in abundance, cicadas keeping you awake on the warm nights, gold finches, night hawks, and blackbirds, and a parent coyote giving the pups a singing lesson on full moon night. Sunsets were varied and beautiful as usual. We tried to stay up many nights in a row to see the full moon next to Mars - no Venus - no Saturn - no the last official claim was Jupiter. I lost track of which one it actually was. On Thursday night it was supposed to be the biggest. I stayed up. It got to a certain point in the sky and then they started moving across the sky in the same position - it never got close. Then someone said the idea that it was going to be as big as the moon was an Internet hoax. On the other side of the sky Mars, Venus, and Saturn were almost lined up and bigger than Jupiter. But the night sky was full of stars and clarity. We saw something move across the sky several nights in a row that kind of bounced around with one big white light. We have noticed this before in Kansas. It doesn't move like an airplanes and they moved across the sky in opposite directions as the strange light. The airplanes usually have 3 lights, a red, a green and one white - not as big as the bouncy thing. We always end up wondering if our eyes are playing tricks on us when it starts bouncing around.
It was good (sort of) to see the family. The dynamics were the same BS and several people make no effort the have a better idea. In the midst of all of that, as I was able to get online, I found out that a high school classmate had passed away suddenly. He regularly posted on the class website funny stories and was in his own way quite a writer. (See previous post.) Before my trip I learned that my favorite published writer, Ted Andrews had passed away last October. I was very sad at the news of both of these men about my age.
I found myself screaming inside "Life is too short and can end without a warning for all of this childish petty bickering. Yes, all the drama gives you something interesting and different to listen to but find some joy to focus on and some love - if nothing else the beauty of the land!" But it isn't my place to judge or to tell others how to live their lives. I found myself increasingly hiding away in our little vacation like house and riding alone on the red 4-wheeler to the farm. It was fun except when that white pick-up truck would come flying down the dirt road and I would eat limestone gravel dust for five minutes. One day I put on sunblock before I took off for my ride - I had arms that looked like they had a coat of concrete on them after the dust from the trucks.
I am back in Georgia now. My 14 plus year old cat, Autumn just came by for a little holding - she doesn't like holding very often - and her kisses on the top of her head. She gave me some smiles and licked my hand and now she is washing me off of her. But that is Autumn. Zeus and Oden are more affectionate than usual and Precious is her usual hug me self. The dog is still mad at me and not eating yet. She does this for a few days when I leave her - though Buzz stayed here and she wasn't alone. She just has such a good pout when I displease her. When the act doesn't get anywhere she eats all of her food as long as no one is looking.
So life goes on. I choose to see the beauty and enjoy it. I want to make some changes and my husband and I want to produce income in more consistent ways. There are things we want to do and places we want to go. I look at it this way. If life as we know it is going to end in 2012, then let's live it up. Who knows what kind of life we will end up in next time? I choose to believe in moving forward to a new and better idea - right now right this minute. It is all good and all God. There is only One Power and I choose to use it for happiness. Katherine Ari
Thursday, August 26, 2010
To honor Paul Lewis and thoughts about God
August 26, 2010
Yesterday, August 25, 2010 I turned to my high school class website. I am on a vacation this week in a tiny rural Kansas town where there isn’t much to do except, thanks to my brother-in-law, I can get on the Internet or just fight chigger bites. I had commented on a couple of subjects posted by some former classmates that carry on about local Hugo, Oklahoma stuff and so I went back to see if they had answered me. I scrolled down to see what posts followed my last story to find that two hours earlier one of the most regular posters, Paul Lewis, had died. The day before he was posting pictures and planning the next Hugo ’69 supper club meeting as usual.
I was shocked and saddened and frankly in disbelief. “This can’t be,” I thought as my mind tried to wrap itself around such a sudden announcement.
I didn’t know Paul really in high school. I knew who he was but I doubt if I ever had a conversation with him other than a hello here and there. The class had other reunions but for reasons unknown to me I never knew about them until last year in 2009 when someone found me online. The other classmates say Paul was a big help at the gatherings.
I got to know him on the site. He was really wise and funny. I wrote him that he should get his stories and jokes published. Some were not his own but it didn’t matter. They seemed to come from him. I know I frequently go to the site and I always look to his profile for new posting or at the least look at the profile list to see who has last posted. If Paul had a recent entry I was excited and eagerly went to his to read his latest.
The Message forum regularly had postings by him and Larry Lee and a few others who obviously are good friends, the men holding down the home front, the ones who stayed and kept Hugo their place for their adult lives. Their funny stories and conversations kept all of the Class of 1969 connected. Here is what was going on in Hugo. I felt connected and was a fan of Paul’s humor. He really didn’t know me but I felt I knew him.
He loved his grandchildren and children in general. I can’t imagine going to our website and not reading posts from Paul. It will not be the same. And I know that his close friends are totally at a loss for words. To lose a good friend is not one you prepare yourself for. I have said before death is the pits. It is the one thing that medical science has not figured out a pill to take to make it go away. My son says “death” is the pill itself, the way to experience grief and get through it. There is no easy way and everyone experiences it in their own way. There is no prescription, nothing but time itself to make it better and no matter how much others try to decide how much time we need they can’t. No one knows but me how much and how long it takes to grieve when someone I care about passes away.
And I do feel sad about Paul Lewis. I know his beliefs and mine did not necessarily match much or our lifestyles. Our religious beliefs differed. But as a writer myself I don’t have to sit down and talk in person to know the inner person when I read his writings, his stories, and his anecdotes. He told us a lot about himself on the class site. He shared a lot of love and I am grateful to have known him and his love for his family and friends through his words, his funny stories and jokes. I felt I knew him and that was okay.
We will all miss him and I send my love and prayers to him family and friends.
Page 2
As others have posted on the class site and I am sure more will comment, there are comments about his love of God and that he is now in a better place. I began to think about what I would want said about me if I were to transition to another dimension.
My spiritual beliefs are not traditional and I find myself wanting people with traditional beliefs to understand me. I believe that what works for one person may not work for the next but that there are truths that when the dogma and interpretations are removed, are the same for anyone.
I do not believe in a man God out there in the clouds. I believe that “God” is a Universal force that is responsible for everything in creation. We can agree on that. God is responsible for everything and is everywhere present all the time. I believe that Jesus found a way to completely connect with the Divine power all the time and his teachings say that we can do the same. He was one of us and not separate from us or above us. He promised we could do the same things as him and even greater things than He did.
I believe that this God force is impersonal. It can be used for good or bad but it is all God. There is only Power in the universe and we can use it for good as I think we should or we can use it for things that will hurt others. Do I love God? God is Love. I know love and I know that God is in me all of the time and that I choose to use the God in me to love, always love.
Going to a better place is the idea of heaven after we die. I don’t believe I have to die to get to that better place. I believe heaven is what I create in my life while I am alive. It is joy, peace, fun and enjoying life. I see beauty and love and peace of mind. I want to create these things and that is what I choose to see. It isn’t that I look at life though rose colored glasses and never see the dark side of life. I just choose to find the good in everyone and every situation. I believe the more I focus on joy, on good health, on happiness, on beauty, the more I experience a good place now.
And when I die or pass on, well I believe that the body dies but the Soul which is the part most connected to the Universal Power does not die, can not die, and like God is infinite. I don’t know where God will take me next. I hope if there is karma that by living a life of love that where I go next is a beautiful place but I don’t know. I haven’t gone there yet. All I really can control is how I experience the life I have right now. I choose to believe there are solutions to conflicts. I choose to see love and wonder and growth. I choose my thoughts and my actions. There is a fertile field that is my mind and it is constantly in a state of being ready for a new crop of productive thoughts. I decided some time ago to make every effort I can to control what is planted in the fertile field.
I am grateful to have known a man named Paul Lewis. He made me laugh and feel good. He contributed to my growth and some healing as I soaked up a new and better idea about being from Hugo, Oklahoma and the Class of 1969. I believe he shared his stories unconditionally and that was pretty cool. He felt comfortable telling them and didn’t fear that someone would not accept him. That pretty well says a man who had come to accept himself. It is an example we all can follow and a direction we can strive to accomplish in each of our lives. I am blessed by getting to know him through his writings.
Yesterday, August 25, 2010 I turned to my high school class website. I am on a vacation this week in a tiny rural Kansas town where there isn’t much to do except, thanks to my brother-in-law, I can get on the Internet or just fight chigger bites. I had commented on a couple of subjects posted by some former classmates that carry on about local Hugo, Oklahoma stuff and so I went back to see if they had answered me. I scrolled down to see what posts followed my last story to find that two hours earlier one of the most regular posters, Paul Lewis, had died. The day before he was posting pictures and planning the next Hugo ’69 supper club meeting as usual.
I was shocked and saddened and frankly in disbelief. “This can’t be,” I thought as my mind tried to wrap itself around such a sudden announcement.
I didn’t know Paul really in high school. I knew who he was but I doubt if I ever had a conversation with him other than a hello here and there. The class had other reunions but for reasons unknown to me I never knew about them until last year in 2009 when someone found me online. The other classmates say Paul was a big help at the gatherings.
I got to know him on the site. He was really wise and funny. I wrote him that he should get his stories and jokes published. Some were not his own but it didn’t matter. They seemed to come from him. I know I frequently go to the site and I always look to his profile for new posting or at the least look at the profile list to see who has last posted. If Paul had a recent entry I was excited and eagerly went to his to read his latest.
The Message forum regularly had postings by him and Larry Lee and a few others who obviously are good friends, the men holding down the home front, the ones who stayed and kept Hugo their place for their adult lives. Their funny stories and conversations kept all of the Class of 1969 connected. Here is what was going on in Hugo. I felt connected and was a fan of Paul’s humor. He really didn’t know me but I felt I knew him.
He loved his grandchildren and children in general. I can’t imagine going to our website and not reading posts from Paul. It will not be the same. And I know that his close friends are totally at a loss for words. To lose a good friend is not one you prepare yourself for. I have said before death is the pits. It is the one thing that medical science has not figured out a pill to take to make it go away. My son says “death” is the pill itself, the way to experience grief and get through it. There is no easy way and everyone experiences it in their own way. There is no prescription, nothing but time itself to make it better and no matter how much others try to decide how much time we need they can’t. No one knows but me how much and how long it takes to grieve when someone I care about passes away.
And I do feel sad about Paul Lewis. I know his beliefs and mine did not necessarily match much or our lifestyles. Our religious beliefs differed. But as a writer myself I don’t have to sit down and talk in person to know the inner person when I read his writings, his stories, and his anecdotes. He told us a lot about himself on the class site. He shared a lot of love and I am grateful to have known him and his love for his family and friends through his words, his funny stories and jokes. I felt I knew him and that was okay.
We will all miss him and I send my love and prayers to him family and friends.
Page 2
As others have posted on the class site and I am sure more will comment, there are comments about his love of God and that he is now in a better place. I began to think about what I would want said about me if I were to transition to another dimension.
My spiritual beliefs are not traditional and I find myself wanting people with traditional beliefs to understand me. I believe that what works for one person may not work for the next but that there are truths that when the dogma and interpretations are removed, are the same for anyone.
I do not believe in a man God out there in the clouds. I believe that “God” is a Universal force that is responsible for everything in creation. We can agree on that. God is responsible for everything and is everywhere present all the time. I believe that Jesus found a way to completely connect with the Divine power all the time and his teachings say that we can do the same. He was one of us and not separate from us or above us. He promised we could do the same things as him and even greater things than He did.
I believe that this God force is impersonal. It can be used for good or bad but it is all God. There is only Power in the universe and we can use it for good as I think we should or we can use it for things that will hurt others. Do I love God? God is Love. I know love and I know that God is in me all of the time and that I choose to use the God in me to love, always love.
Going to a better place is the idea of heaven after we die. I don’t believe I have to die to get to that better place. I believe heaven is what I create in my life while I am alive. It is joy, peace, fun and enjoying life. I see beauty and love and peace of mind. I want to create these things and that is what I choose to see. It isn’t that I look at life though rose colored glasses and never see the dark side of life. I just choose to find the good in everyone and every situation. I believe the more I focus on joy, on good health, on happiness, on beauty, the more I experience a good place now.
And when I die or pass on, well I believe that the body dies but the Soul which is the part most connected to the Universal Power does not die, can not die, and like God is infinite. I don’t know where God will take me next. I hope if there is karma that by living a life of love that where I go next is a beautiful place but I don’t know. I haven’t gone there yet. All I really can control is how I experience the life I have right now. I choose to believe there are solutions to conflicts. I choose to see love and wonder and growth. I choose my thoughts and my actions. There is a fertile field that is my mind and it is constantly in a state of being ready for a new crop of productive thoughts. I decided some time ago to make every effort I can to control what is planted in the fertile field.
I am grateful to have known a man named Paul Lewis. He made me laugh and feel good. He contributed to my growth and some healing as I soaked up a new and better idea about being from Hugo, Oklahoma and the Class of 1969. I believe he shared his stories unconditionally and that was pretty cool. He felt comfortable telling them and didn’t fear that someone would not accept him. That pretty well says a man who had come to accept himself. It is an example we all can follow and a direction we can strive to accomplish in each of our lives. I am blessed by getting to know him through his writings.
Friday, March 12, 2010
Updates and On my Mind
Greetings readers and friends-
I have been absent from the blog for a while doing other soul searching and making some lifestyle changes. I have some great ideas for something new and have been concentrating my energies on finding funding for the project. It will take between $30,000 and $50,000 to shoot a pilot for an interactive virtual exercise program. My ideal is to contract with Sony-Play Station to make it and it will work on any kind of home exercise equipment, but I have to jump thru some hoops of fire, cross my "t's" and dot my "i's" and find them to do all of that in order to get this idea benefiting many people and many programs. I find out about many different programs that are benefiting certain charities and once I get the idea going, it will benefit a non-profit organization - that of the National Parks System - but I have to manifest the program.
Part of this idea would be very valuable for the effort to stop obesity in children. I know that the school systems are responsible for a large part of a child's day, but the real place that diet and exercise start is AT HOME. Parents must take responsibility to change their own diets and exercise habits and not depend on the schools to take care of the obesity problem. BUT it doesn't have to be gym type exercise that only 12% of society uses. It is a big task but all of society will benefit if we ALL start eating better, stop eating junk food, and start growing healthier children. It is also true that when we adults eat cleaner whole foods that we think more clearly and feel younger, look healthier, and make better decisions. It all works together.
I would like to find supporters - both financial and moral for these ideas. Good diet an exercise starts at home and I have some ideas of how parents can do more at home. I am also looking for contacts with Sony - Play Station, with Michelle Obama, with some of these successful business men and corporations that look for philanthropic causes. I have a good idea and want to find a way to present it without worrying that someone will steal the idea from me. If you have some connections or ideas, please let me here from you.
I have been absent from the blog for a while doing other soul searching and making some lifestyle changes. I have some great ideas for something new and have been concentrating my energies on finding funding for the project. It will take between $30,000 and $50,000 to shoot a pilot for an interactive virtual exercise program. My ideal is to contract with Sony-Play Station to make it and it will work on any kind of home exercise equipment, but I have to jump thru some hoops of fire, cross my "t's" and dot my "i's" and find them to do all of that in order to get this idea benefiting many people and many programs. I find out about many different programs that are benefiting certain charities and once I get the idea going, it will benefit a non-profit organization - that of the National Parks System - but I have to manifest the program.
Part of this idea would be very valuable for the effort to stop obesity in children. I know that the school systems are responsible for a large part of a child's day, but the real place that diet and exercise start is AT HOME. Parents must take responsibility to change their own diets and exercise habits and not depend on the schools to take care of the obesity problem. BUT it doesn't have to be gym type exercise that only 12% of society uses. It is a big task but all of society will benefit if we ALL start eating better, stop eating junk food, and start growing healthier children. It is also true that when we adults eat cleaner whole foods that we think more clearly and feel younger, look healthier, and make better decisions. It all works together.
I would like to find supporters - both financial and moral for these ideas. Good diet an exercise starts at home and I have some ideas of how parents can do more at home. I am also looking for contacts with Sony - Play Station, with Michelle Obama, with some of these successful business men and corporations that look for philanthropic causes. I have a good idea and want to find a way to present it without worrying that someone will steal the idea from me. If you have some connections or ideas, please let me here from you.
Saturday, February 6, 2010
Hey Readers, Listen UP!
Message to my readers:
On my blog I have a way to check my readers/hits. Many days the numbers are low but sometimes, I have had readers but I never hear from you. If you want to comment – or just say hello – just comment and add that you don’t want your comment published. I would like to hear from you and every comment is forwarded to my email for approval before it appears on the blog. If there is a subject on your mind, even if it is not something I have covered before, just ask. I love to open discussions about things important in our lives. Thanks for dropping in to my “Aha!” moments. Katherine Ari
On my blog I have a way to check my readers/hits. Many days the numbers are low but sometimes, I have had readers but I never hear from you. If you want to comment – or just say hello – just comment and add that you don’t want your comment published. I would like to hear from you and every comment is forwarded to my email for approval before it appears on the blog. If there is a subject on your mind, even if it is not something I have covered before, just ask. I love to open discussions about things important in our lives. Thanks for dropping in to my “Aha!” moments. Katherine Ari
You Are What You Eat
You are What you Eat by Katherine Ari, February 6, 2010
Have you ever heard the expression, “You are what you Eat”? Have you given that much thought? I am here to stand on my soapbox to tell you that it is time you do think about it. What we eat goes into our body to make it function. If we eat food that is really not food at all, your intelligent body and mind does not know what to do with non-food. We would like to think that it just goes on through in body waste – but that is not the case. What happens is that is goes into fat cells. Considering we are becoming known as the nation of obesity, there are way too many of us that have been eating things our body does not know what to do with.
Some of you may say, “I’m not fat.” First of all, you don’t have to be overweight to have too much excess body fat. I have met many a person that appears lean that has other health problems. Another response is I don’t have any particular health problems but it will catch up with you. But even beyond the promise that bad eating and drinking will eventually catch up on your body, is that the bad food (and drink) choices do influence your life now. When you eat a clean diet, you think more clearly, you feel more alive, and it is a lot easier to tune in or hear what you inner higher power tells you is the right decision for anything in your life. You are more stable emotionally and think clearly.
I have studied many diets. I have tried many. I lost weight. But the weight returned eventually. The right way to eat is not just about losing weight. You ARE what you eat. If you want to be a whole healthy vibrant and energetic person, then you should eat whole, healthy, vibrant and energetic food. White sugar, white flour, white processed rice, chips loaded with fat and other processed or artificial ingredients, anything that is so far removed from the original grain or fruit or vegetable, food loaded with preservatives, foods with things on the ingredient list that you can pronounce much less know what they are, fats that are not naturally occurring, and the list goes on and on are NOT whole foods. They are sold to get you hooked and addicted to eat more and spend more and more money on them. Then add the foods laden with hormones, drugs, artificial colors, and fake whatever like BHA and GMO laced with pesticides and other unnecessary things. These things are not things the human body’s computer – the brain - knows how to digest. They go to fat and in other parts of the body throwing it out of balance.
Every pimple, every skin problem, every health problem – EVERY HEALTH PROBLEM can be traced back to prolonged bad diet. For a very, very long time the medical community denied that food had anything to do with medical problems. But food has everything to do with health issues – EVERYTHING! To get healthy is a permanent lifestyle change. You can’t eat clean for a few weeks or months and then go back to eating junk food and heavy sugar products. I know I can’t go back to eating sugar ever. It is an addiction like alcohol for the alcoholic. It will literally kill me. Non-food indulgence will undue in one meal everything I have accomplished and my progress for months. The more of us that refuse to eat junk food, the sooner the food industry will have to change what they sell, what they grow, and what they make their money on. You are what you eat and I can help you make the change you need to make.
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
Book Review, Dieting, and Reality Shows - part one
Reality shows have been around longer than the media like to admit. The Academy Awards and the Emmys as well as other reward shows are reality shows. There are unexpected turns of events and you don’t always know who is going to win. Certainly televised football games and other sports are reality shows. Any game show, daytime or nighttime, is a reality show. I confess. I like reality shows – well, some of them. I don’t like the ones where people are playing mind games and acting like jerks. I don’t like the ones where the “star” got the show because he can use a power trip and yell constantly at the contestants. Yet, with some of them like American Idol, So You Think you Can Dance or Dancing with the Stars, and America’s Got Talent, though the judges are sometimes too blunt, the criticisms are mostly honest – not vicious.
When The Biggest Loser entered the list, I really liked Bob, but Jillian’s get in their face attitude turned me off. I have always fought weight issues and know just what the contestants are going through. They already feel bad about themselves and her screaming at them seemed to be for the dramatic effect to stir up interest but harsh. Then for some reason she left for a season and they had this Barbie doll, Kim. She was sweet but didn’t get the results Jillian had with the players as well as the ratings NBC wanted. So Jillian came back and led the team that no one chose – the black team who came back and dominated the challenges.
Next season it was Jillian and Bob. I imagined trying out for the show, but could someone my age – a baby boomer get on the show? But then I considered what it would be like to have Jillian as my trainer and I didn’t want her screaming in my face. But over the many seasons it has been on, they have allowed her to show her other side. I still don’t understand why she and Bob feel they have to make the contestants hurt – other than the show has to move them fast and the drama helps the ratings. But beyond the hype, Jillian has shown herself to be compassionate and smart. They have to promote the sponsors but once I got one of her books I believe that she doesn’t really believe in some of the stuff they put on that show.
I was particularly drawn to her book, Master Your Metabolism. My husband, Doug, and I have spent many years and many dollars studying nutrition and all the diets out there. He has had times where he was over weight but currently it is his blood pressure, dark circles under his eyes, and weakness in his muscles with lots of fatigue that concerns both of us. My weight, blood pressure, late onset acne, and another issue I won’t go into are my concerns but I really just want to be healthy and live life to the fullest.
I read the book and studied it. Doug read it. We have long believed that raw food is really the best, but all the food prep and time involved as well as trying to maintain the regime while working on landscaping jobs has pulled us off the program over and over. I liked the idea of mostly raw organic food when available with some animal protein. Most of the raw food “experts” are strict vegans and have volumes proclaiming why you should not eat any animal products. Yet, in the back of my mind I remember a Cherokee elder woman saying if you have Type “O” blood type and have Native American Blood in you, you will find it hard to be 100% vegetarian. When I am eating the raw diet and sticking with it, I really don’t crave the meat. But when we are doing heavy labor jobs and too tired to make food when we get home ten or twelve hours later, the men especially want some sort of animal protein. Nuts and seeds and veggies just aren’t enough. And none of us feel like preparing anything much less have the time to do it. We go get the chicken house salad or some other form of chicken meal.
Jillian Michael’s book left me with many questions and comments but I have yet to find a way to directly inquire with her. Of course there is the disclaimer in the front of the book, but, one, I don’t have the money to go get my own endocrinologist and have an exam and tests done, and two, the comments and questions I have are not so involved that I should have to pay someone for the answers. The idea of our metabolism being out of whack is right and I really agree with the basic premises. But just making the changes she suggests does not detoxify a lifetime of issues in your body.
For example, Doug handled a lot of pesticides working on the farm when he was growing up. Though the food on the farm was mostly homegrown and not full of preservatives, he had a steady diet of white sugar in deserts and white flour in bread. I suspect that Kansas mothers and grandmothers did like most post World Ward II cooks did and add lots of sugar to everything - and fat. He was breastfed, but his brother and sister had a bottle. I had a bottle filled with Pet Milk and Karo syrup. So until I ate food, which was pushed very early, I was mal-nourished. Is it any wonder I had a potbelly like the malnourished tribal people in other world countries? And what I was fed when they started me on solid food was starch, fat, and sugar. It was what they did in those days. It is not any wonder that I have had weight problems all my life?
The food plans in the back of the book are good starting points but she is a little tiny woman. How can someone Doug’s size and being a man or someone my size eat such a small amount? Just reading the lists makes me hungry. There just isn’t much food – like 3 pieces of nitrate free bacon and half of a grapefruit are suppose to be a breakfast. And the idea of eating such small amounts every four hours AND exercising inbetween or working on a labor job does NOT work. In our case, we would get crazy or collapse. I do believe in portioning the servings but get in trouble when I get out shopping or paying bills and get beyond the four hours unexpectedly. Then I get really weak and shaky – and irritable. As with all “diets” it is about establishing your body’s needs into a rhythm that works for you.
All that being said, the Metabolism diet secrets are still the most effective way to make some changes in your lives. The reality is that if you want to be healthier, whether you are over weight or just unhealthy, you have to be ready to make a lifestyle change that is PERMANENT! No diet works if you think you can diet for a while and then go back to the old habits that caused the problem, whatever it was, in the first place. But we are stubborn. We rebel against never having those wonderful deserts and fried chicken we love and crave. We have always eaten for comfort, because of unhappiness or stress, or to be like everyone else. There is a list of excuses we make. Let’s be honest. It isn’t easy when the rest of society is out there eating crap and not worrying about it. Someone I know who is in my family says, “Just eat what you want” but boy does he get ugly about fat people. But you can’t just eat what you want if the imbalances in your metabolism have caused excess weight or high blood pressure or diabetes or acne or circles under your eyes or tumors or any other undesirable health condition.
If you have read my previous blogs, you know I believe in a spiritual connection with everything as well as belief systems and core beliefs. I will get into that more in future blogs. The most general thing I can say about this diet plan to balancing your hormones is eat whole foods, organic when you can get them and watch portions. That means eliminating the white foods – white flour, white sugar, white rice, and all the variations of processed food that are not real food. When you are watching what you eat, you don’t crave the sugar and non-organic whole grain bread as much. In fact, I can make an organic loaf of whole grain bread last 3 or 4 weeks. Fresh vegetables, fresh fruit, baked or grilled chicken and meats, organic dairy – I won’t eat any dairy if it isn’t organic, and no snack foods like chips and crackers are easy enough to find.
(end part one)
When The Biggest Loser entered the list, I really liked Bob, but Jillian’s get in their face attitude turned me off. I have always fought weight issues and know just what the contestants are going through. They already feel bad about themselves and her screaming at them seemed to be for the dramatic effect to stir up interest but harsh. Then for some reason she left for a season and they had this Barbie doll, Kim. She was sweet but didn’t get the results Jillian had with the players as well as the ratings NBC wanted. So Jillian came back and led the team that no one chose – the black team who came back and dominated the challenges.
Next season it was Jillian and Bob. I imagined trying out for the show, but could someone my age – a baby boomer get on the show? But then I considered what it would be like to have Jillian as my trainer and I didn’t want her screaming in my face. But over the many seasons it has been on, they have allowed her to show her other side. I still don’t understand why she and Bob feel they have to make the contestants hurt – other than the show has to move them fast and the drama helps the ratings. But beyond the hype, Jillian has shown herself to be compassionate and smart. They have to promote the sponsors but once I got one of her books I believe that she doesn’t really believe in some of the stuff they put on that show.
I was particularly drawn to her book, Master Your Metabolism. My husband, Doug, and I have spent many years and many dollars studying nutrition and all the diets out there. He has had times where he was over weight but currently it is his blood pressure, dark circles under his eyes, and weakness in his muscles with lots of fatigue that concerns both of us. My weight, blood pressure, late onset acne, and another issue I won’t go into are my concerns but I really just want to be healthy and live life to the fullest.
I read the book and studied it. Doug read it. We have long believed that raw food is really the best, but all the food prep and time involved as well as trying to maintain the regime while working on landscaping jobs has pulled us off the program over and over. I liked the idea of mostly raw organic food when available with some animal protein. Most of the raw food “experts” are strict vegans and have volumes proclaiming why you should not eat any animal products. Yet, in the back of my mind I remember a Cherokee elder woman saying if you have Type “O” blood type and have Native American Blood in you, you will find it hard to be 100% vegetarian. When I am eating the raw diet and sticking with it, I really don’t crave the meat. But when we are doing heavy labor jobs and too tired to make food when we get home ten or twelve hours later, the men especially want some sort of animal protein. Nuts and seeds and veggies just aren’t enough. And none of us feel like preparing anything much less have the time to do it. We go get the chicken house salad or some other form of chicken meal.
Jillian Michael’s book left me with many questions and comments but I have yet to find a way to directly inquire with her. Of course there is the disclaimer in the front of the book, but, one, I don’t have the money to go get my own endocrinologist and have an exam and tests done, and two, the comments and questions I have are not so involved that I should have to pay someone for the answers. The idea of our metabolism being out of whack is right and I really agree with the basic premises. But just making the changes she suggests does not detoxify a lifetime of issues in your body.
For example, Doug handled a lot of pesticides working on the farm when he was growing up. Though the food on the farm was mostly homegrown and not full of preservatives, he had a steady diet of white sugar in deserts and white flour in bread. I suspect that Kansas mothers and grandmothers did like most post World Ward II cooks did and add lots of sugar to everything - and fat. He was breastfed, but his brother and sister had a bottle. I had a bottle filled with Pet Milk and Karo syrup. So until I ate food, which was pushed very early, I was mal-nourished. Is it any wonder I had a potbelly like the malnourished tribal people in other world countries? And what I was fed when they started me on solid food was starch, fat, and sugar. It was what they did in those days. It is not any wonder that I have had weight problems all my life?
The food plans in the back of the book are good starting points but she is a little tiny woman. How can someone Doug’s size and being a man or someone my size eat such a small amount? Just reading the lists makes me hungry. There just isn’t much food – like 3 pieces of nitrate free bacon and half of a grapefruit are suppose to be a breakfast. And the idea of eating such small amounts every four hours AND exercising inbetween or working on a labor job does NOT work. In our case, we would get crazy or collapse. I do believe in portioning the servings but get in trouble when I get out shopping or paying bills and get beyond the four hours unexpectedly. Then I get really weak and shaky – and irritable. As with all “diets” it is about establishing your body’s needs into a rhythm that works for you.
All that being said, the Metabolism diet secrets are still the most effective way to make some changes in your lives. The reality is that if you want to be healthier, whether you are over weight or just unhealthy, you have to be ready to make a lifestyle change that is PERMANENT! No diet works if you think you can diet for a while and then go back to the old habits that caused the problem, whatever it was, in the first place. But we are stubborn. We rebel against never having those wonderful deserts and fried chicken we love and crave. We have always eaten for comfort, because of unhappiness or stress, or to be like everyone else. There is a list of excuses we make. Let’s be honest. It isn’t easy when the rest of society is out there eating crap and not worrying about it. Someone I know who is in my family says, “Just eat what you want” but boy does he get ugly about fat people. But you can’t just eat what you want if the imbalances in your metabolism have caused excess weight or high blood pressure or diabetes or acne or circles under your eyes or tumors or any other undesirable health condition.
If you have read my previous blogs, you know I believe in a spiritual connection with everything as well as belief systems and core beliefs. I will get into that more in future blogs. The most general thing I can say about this diet plan to balancing your hormones is eat whole foods, organic when you can get them and watch portions. That means eliminating the white foods – white flour, white sugar, white rice, and all the variations of processed food that are not real food. When you are watching what you eat, you don’t crave the sugar and non-organic whole grain bread as much. In fact, I can make an organic loaf of whole grain bread last 3 or 4 weeks. Fresh vegetables, fresh fruit, baked or grilled chicken and meats, organic dairy – I won’t eat any dairy if it isn’t organic, and no snack foods like chips and crackers are easy enough to find.
(end part one)
Book Review, Dieting, and Reality Shows
January 26, 2010
Today’s topic – Reality Shows and Health and Dieting- part two
I just spent a week with my in-laws in the Florida Keys. They like to go out to eat because they don’t like to prepare food after a long day at work. The restaurants have many tempting things that torture a person trying to diet. Some choices are okay, but it was really hard because ordering salads that are 90% white iceberg lettuce can burn you out on salads – blah! Most places have grilled fish but the fried conch fritters or fried calamari are tempting tidbits and the family likes to order appetizers. The side dish choices are baked potatoes, mashed potatoes, white or yellow rice or fries usually. One place had fresh green beans. The family also loves to order a desert for everyone to have a bite or two – mostly because one person in particular like sweets and wants everyone to eat some so he won’t be the only sugar eater. But I just can’t do that. My husband complimented me on turning down the deserts. It helped that I really don’t like Key Lime pie. But on the last night they also ordered a cocoanut custard filled cake. That one was torture because cocoanut custard is one of my biggest former loves. And sometimes you order something that seems harmless enough and then it obviously has sugar in it. When you are a sugar-a-holic, one bite does you in. And you don’t want to waste the money paid for the food by not eating it.
Then there is the general stress of being in a family situation. There is eating the mother-in-law’s favorite appetizer she always fixes. There is eating when you are bored or wanting to avoid talking. There is wanting to try something new like conch fritters or catch of the day with almandine sauce, asking for a small baked potato and getting a large one, ordering crab and it turns out to be fake, sugar sweetened and artificial colored crabmeat. Field greens are listed as the ingredient of the salad and it is white lettuce and one little piece of romaine when they bring it out. The tomatoes are green and awful and HMO grown. Cheese on a salad is cheap processed fake cheddar. No restaurant has a salad dressing that isn’t commercial. Organic dairy is findable and it is a good thing you won’t be there long because it is too expensive to use it regularly. But you want to have a good visit with the family’s once a year get together and you don’t want to complain and bitch about the food choices. And you come home feeling like crap, tired, and having to go through withdrawal once again feeling like your clothes are tight because as hard as you tried, you still ended up eating food, or too much food, you didn’t want to eat.
When Doug came home for two weeks for Christmas and New Years, he read the book but I found it harder to stay with the metabolism program. For one thing, he doesn’t need to lose weight. He needs to lower his BP and gain muscle mass back. He is a 6’1” man and needs more calories. He wants to eat in the evening especially after 9 p.m. – a habit he needs to break but he is working in FL living with his dad. So all the challenges I spoke of above being with family, he has all the time, every day. I have added some organic cheese and Greek yogurt but he can’t eat any dairy. Many of the recipes at the end of the book contain dairy.
I can do most of this because right now it is winter and our work is the work Doug is doing with his family in Florida. I have time now, but the truth is that I don’t like to cook all the time. When we are working, I don’t feel like cooking. I get burned out on cooking very easily. I would rather sit here and write about food rather than go to the kitchen and fix something. Last night I found myself eating something after 9 p.m. – not because I was hungry but because there was something in the frig. After I heated it up and started eating, I asked myself, “why am I eating this?” The routine is off after the week with family. I thought I could return to the routine the next day – but that hasn’t happened yet.
Eating the right foods is essential to living a healthy long life. When my mother started having health problems in her sixties, she asked me for some alternative ideas – but I knew she wouldn’t do anything I suggested. She had always refused to change her diet in any way making all the excuses in the world or just down right arguing with me about the sugar and white flour and all the cake and fake ice cream she always had in the house. If you asked Daddy if he like spinach and vegetables, he would say he did like them but Mother would argue that he wouldn’t eat them. I don’t know if he wouldn’t eat them or if it was her that didn’t like them unwilling to change her rigid habits. I answered her that she wouldn’t like the answers we would give her about her health when she wanted a quick fix. If she wasn’t willing to make some changes, then she needed to take the pills and advice of the Medical doctors. Their treatment plans were for someone with a Standard American Diet and lifestyle – not necessarily healthy but what mainstream society was doing. I hated it. She died of cancer at 72 and Daddy died one week after his 79th birthday of congestive heart failure. She had slight diabetes until the cancer treatment and steroids shot her insulin up into life threatening ranges. Now my in-laws are in their eighties and their comments and thinking are slipping. Just a conversation with either of them is a challenge. As many excuses I can list for not eating right, there really is not other choice. It means that I have to find other things to do for fun, to soothe myself when I need comfort or am lonely, and find foods that taste good. It means I have to prepare my own food and not eat out – that is a disaster waiting to happen on healthy eating. And I have to watch my thinking – take control of my thoughts and not let random thoughts draw to me things I don’t want in my life.
If you are ready to take charge of your life and your health and make PERMANENT changes, then I recommend Master Your Metabolism by Jillian Michaels as a starting point. Then contact me with questions and get some personal support with your decision. For many people, the ideas are so foreign that they may turn back to the old habits really quick. For us, it isn’t such a stretch because we know so much already and most of the book supports a natural lifestyle we already believe in – even if we haven’t always been doing the program. That is why I feel I can help others no matter where they are on the path to good health. Reading the book I have finally decided I do like Jillian Michaels and hope someday to get to talk with her. Meanwhile, it is time to make some healthy lunch and I have a full refrigerator to choose from.
Today’s topic – Reality Shows and Health and Dieting- part two
I just spent a week with my in-laws in the Florida Keys. They like to go out to eat because they don’t like to prepare food after a long day at work. The restaurants have many tempting things that torture a person trying to diet. Some choices are okay, but it was really hard because ordering salads that are 90% white iceberg lettuce can burn you out on salads – blah! Most places have grilled fish but the fried conch fritters or fried calamari are tempting tidbits and the family likes to order appetizers. The side dish choices are baked potatoes, mashed potatoes, white or yellow rice or fries usually. One place had fresh green beans. The family also loves to order a desert for everyone to have a bite or two – mostly because one person in particular like sweets and wants everyone to eat some so he won’t be the only sugar eater. But I just can’t do that. My husband complimented me on turning down the deserts. It helped that I really don’t like Key Lime pie. But on the last night they also ordered a cocoanut custard filled cake. That one was torture because cocoanut custard is one of my biggest former loves. And sometimes you order something that seems harmless enough and then it obviously has sugar in it. When you are a sugar-a-holic, one bite does you in. And you don’t want to waste the money paid for the food by not eating it.
Then there is the general stress of being in a family situation. There is eating the mother-in-law’s favorite appetizer she always fixes. There is eating when you are bored or wanting to avoid talking. There is wanting to try something new like conch fritters or catch of the day with almandine sauce, asking for a small baked potato and getting a large one, ordering crab and it turns out to be fake, sugar sweetened and artificial colored crabmeat. Field greens are listed as the ingredient of the salad and it is white lettuce and one little piece of romaine when they bring it out. The tomatoes are green and awful and HMO grown. Cheese on a salad is cheap processed fake cheddar. No restaurant has a salad dressing that isn’t commercial. Organic dairy is findable and it is a good thing you won’t be there long because it is too expensive to use it regularly. But you want to have a good visit with the family’s once a year get together and you don’t want to complain and bitch about the food choices. And you come home feeling like crap, tired, and having to go through withdrawal once again feeling like your clothes are tight because as hard as you tried, you still ended up eating food, or too much food, you didn’t want to eat.
When Doug came home for two weeks for Christmas and New Years, he read the book but I found it harder to stay with the metabolism program. For one thing, he doesn’t need to lose weight. He needs to lower his BP and gain muscle mass back. He is a 6’1” man and needs more calories. He wants to eat in the evening especially after 9 p.m. – a habit he needs to break but he is working in FL living with his dad. So all the challenges I spoke of above being with family, he has all the time, every day. I have added some organic cheese and Greek yogurt but he can’t eat any dairy. Many of the recipes at the end of the book contain dairy.
I can do most of this because right now it is winter and our work is the work Doug is doing with his family in Florida. I have time now, but the truth is that I don’t like to cook all the time. When we are working, I don’t feel like cooking. I get burned out on cooking very easily. I would rather sit here and write about food rather than go to the kitchen and fix something. Last night I found myself eating something after 9 p.m. – not because I was hungry but because there was something in the frig. After I heated it up and started eating, I asked myself, “why am I eating this?” The routine is off after the week with family. I thought I could return to the routine the next day – but that hasn’t happened yet.
Eating the right foods is essential to living a healthy long life. When my mother started having health problems in her sixties, she asked me for some alternative ideas – but I knew she wouldn’t do anything I suggested. She had always refused to change her diet in any way making all the excuses in the world or just down right arguing with me about the sugar and white flour and all the cake and fake ice cream she always had in the house. If you asked Daddy if he like spinach and vegetables, he would say he did like them but Mother would argue that he wouldn’t eat them. I don’t know if he wouldn’t eat them or if it was her that didn’t like them unwilling to change her rigid habits. I answered her that she wouldn’t like the answers we would give her about her health when she wanted a quick fix. If she wasn’t willing to make some changes, then she needed to take the pills and advice of the Medical doctors. Their treatment plans were for someone with a Standard American Diet and lifestyle – not necessarily healthy but what mainstream society was doing. I hated it. She died of cancer at 72 and Daddy died one week after his 79th birthday of congestive heart failure. She had slight diabetes until the cancer treatment and steroids shot her insulin up into life threatening ranges. Now my in-laws are in their eighties and their comments and thinking are slipping. Just a conversation with either of them is a challenge. As many excuses I can list for not eating right, there really is not other choice. It means that I have to find other things to do for fun, to soothe myself when I need comfort or am lonely, and find foods that taste good. It means I have to prepare my own food and not eat out – that is a disaster waiting to happen on healthy eating. And I have to watch my thinking – take control of my thoughts and not let random thoughts draw to me things I don’t want in my life.
If you are ready to take charge of your life and your health and make PERMANENT changes, then I recommend Master Your Metabolism by Jillian Michaels as a starting point. Then contact me with questions and get some personal support with your decision. For many people, the ideas are so foreign that they may turn back to the old habits really quick. For us, it isn’t such a stretch because we know so much already and most of the book supports a natural lifestyle we already believe in – even if we haven’t always been doing the program. That is why I feel I can help others no matter where they are on the path to good health. Reading the book I have finally decided I do like Jillian Michaels and hope someday to get to talk with her. Meanwhile, it is time to make some healthy lunch and I have a full refrigerator to choose from.
Monday, January 11, 2010
Happy New Year
I'm back to the blog and have many things to talk about but the first thing is to say to all Happy New Year. As we start the new year with resolutions and dreams and hopes to see the economy improve and our own individual circumstances, I am reminded that one of the ways to keep the flow going is to be grateful. It is important to make a list daily of what we are thankful for. Start with the easy stuff and keep writing until you have said thank you God for everything.
Thank you God: for a warm home, electricity, natural gas, water, a bed, a computer, a TV, music, food and coffee.
Thank you God: for my family, my cats and my dog, for my children, and adopted son's son who has brought joy to the whole family.
Thank you God for Love, for Peace, for Joy, for prosperity, for abundance, for sunshine on a cold day, for sunshine every day, for the bird that wakes me every morning even though it seems so cold outside you would think it wouldn't be happy - but still it sings its morning song - thank you God. Thank you God for the blue jays and crows who seem to be around a lot keeping watch over my yard and me.
Thank you God for the rest of the family that help us through these lean times.
Thank you God for my friends and my spiritual community, SLCA, and for every blessing I receive from that big group of happy non-judgmental people.
Thank you God for my education, for my dreams and thoughts and ideas. Thank you God for the opportunity to grow and to learn and to share with others and to get better and better. Thank you God for Love and for showing me how to give love to others.
Thank you God for my good automobiles, for the city and state who provides good roads and good utilities. Thank you for my cell phone and the internet. Thank you for good books and good music.
Thank you God for good and perfect health for me, for my family, especially for my pets as they age.
Thank you God, Thank you God, Thank you God for everything for I KNOW that God is all there is. God IS ALL there is! It is so.
Thank you God: for a warm home, electricity, natural gas, water, a bed, a computer, a TV, music, food and coffee.
Thank you God: for my family, my cats and my dog, for my children, and adopted son's son who has brought joy to the whole family.
Thank you God for Love, for Peace, for Joy, for prosperity, for abundance, for sunshine on a cold day, for sunshine every day, for the bird that wakes me every morning even though it seems so cold outside you would think it wouldn't be happy - but still it sings its morning song - thank you God. Thank you God for the blue jays and crows who seem to be around a lot keeping watch over my yard and me.
Thank you God for the rest of the family that help us through these lean times.
Thank you God for my friends and my spiritual community, SLCA, and for every blessing I receive from that big group of happy non-judgmental people.
Thank you God for my education, for my dreams and thoughts and ideas. Thank you God for the opportunity to grow and to learn and to share with others and to get better and better. Thank you God for Love and for showing me how to give love to others.
Thank you God for my good automobiles, for the city and state who provides good roads and good utilities. Thank you for my cell phone and the internet. Thank you for good books and good music.
Thank you God for good and perfect health for me, for my family, especially for my pets as they age.
Thank you God, Thank you God, Thank you God for everything for I KNOW that God is all there is. God IS ALL there is! It is so.
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
Announcement
Just checked my analytics of my blog and saw there are a few checking in. I have been preoccupied with the holidays and having my husband home and a few other things. Keep checking back readers as I will be posting new blogs in a day or so. Hope all are having a great New Year and do let me hear from you. K
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
Remembering Thanksgiving – Old AND NEW Traditions
I was home alone for Thanksgiving this year. I sat down at the piano, played the favorite hymns of Daddy, Mother, and Doug, and I cried. I remembered Thanksgiving always at Grandmother’s house and someone always had to go get Mrs. Idy. The women cooked all morning (and several days before) and then collapsed after the meal. The children had to lie down and got spankings if we weren’t quiet. When we finally got old enough to be outside unattended, we were allowed to get up and go out to play, weather permitting, after an hour of lying down.
The food sat out on the table mostly uncovered except the Jell-O salads and maybe the desserts. It’s a wonder we didn’t get food poisoning. Later we came back and picked around at the food. Sometimes we all had to sit down together for supper. After an unwritten length of time, we would pack up and go home – five miles away. It wasn’t like they had anything new to talk about. They saw each other several times a week.
There weren’t any toys so we grandkids had to make up games. I don’t remember any time that was particularly fun – mostly bickering that would evolve into fights. Then the adults would have to come separate us and give someone or all whippings.
Grandmother was diabetic in her later years. Dr. Waters knew she would “just a little taste” herself into too much and so he always upped her insulin for the holidays. There would be turkey with dressing, canned cranberry sauce and whole berry made from scratch, corn bread and biscuits, a ham and candied sweet potatoes and some orange pecan sweet potatoes. There would be some mostly iceberg lettuce with Thousand Island dressing. Sometimes there would be cold slaw, sauerkraut, and boiled cabbage. No, greens were not a popular fall thing in Oklahoma. There would be green beans, green bean casserole, and corn from the garden both on the cob and creamed corn. There was always a plate of home canned pickles, usually several varieties. There were usually some navy beans and baked beans (like we needed more gas) and certainly some sort of squash something. There may have been some noodle or rice casseroles. Biscuits and cornbread weren’t enough bread. They would add brown and server rolls and white bread. There were mashed potatoes, new potatoes, and canned peas. There sometimes was pea salad, carrot salad, and grape/cranberry salad. The Jell-O salads changed from year to year but someone always made orange Jell-O carrot salad that no one every ate or liked.
Then came the desserts. I remember Mother making an apple pecan cake every year. The banana nut cake got replace with a Scotch chocolate cake with pecan sugary icing. That was replaced with an Italian cocoanut pecan cream cake with cream cheese icing with pecans and cocoanut. Aunt Margie would make a cocoanut cake or chocolate cake or strawberry cake too. Mother wasn’t very good a piecrust but that didn’t stop her from making pies. When frozen crust became available at the stores that made it even easier. She made lemon meringue, chocolate, a really good cocoanut cream, banana cream, and one called Jefferson Davis chess pie. Sometimes she made pecan and pumpkin pies too. There were frequently chocolate chip and oatmeal cookies. Aunt Margie brought many of the same kinds. There was ice cream and whip cream (later cool whip).
One year Grandmother decided to make a pie. The sisters said she made them every year but had stopped when the diabetes came on. It was a butter chess pie – butter, eggs, and sugar. It was decadent – and really good. Mother and Daddy had to hand churn butter when they were growing up. They grew to hate the tasted and smell of butter immensely. They didn’t care for the taste of the butter pie so Grandmother never made it again. I was disappointed but it wasn’t like there wasn’t anything good to replace it.
All you can eat buffets have nothing on a Southern Oklahoma Thanksgiving dinner that shows influence of the tribal potlash ceremonies. There was this Italian Yankee at O.U. who tried to claim his Italian family gathering had an unbeatable spread, but he hadn’t been to one of my family’s holiday dinners. The “potlash” ceremony among farming tribes was a “being” by itself. They were such abundant holiday traditions.
So this year Doug was down in Florida with his family. Azure, Kyler, and Miko have moved away and so has Jeremy. I was going to be alone. Azure sent friends. The first came with a plate of food and the second brought a card and arrived while the first was still here. They left and a while later all of Jeremy’s siblings and girlfriends and cousins came bringing me some of Big Mamas Southern Soul Thanksgiving cooking. As they left another young man arrived. I gave him some pie and found out later that he had stayed home and not had any Thanksgiving dinner. I had a smoked breast and some cranberry sauce and the plate from Jeremy’s grandmother had enough for several meals that I could have shared had I known. I had a wonderful day. I didn’t have to cook but I still had a full dishwasher. I was pleasantly full and tired but so happy.
Thanksgiving memories and traditions – sometimes don’t change, but kids grow up, grandparents and parents pass away. The kids grow up and move away following their own life journey. Sometimes couples have to be apart. It’s sad when you spend Thanksgiving thinking about what was. It is more fun to make new traditions. I didn’t cook for days. I received some Thanksgiving dinner from other families without having too much leftover food along with dirty dishes, pots, and pans. I had a wonderful day. And next year? Well, we will see. It will be filled with some more New Traditions!
The food sat out on the table mostly uncovered except the Jell-O salads and maybe the desserts. It’s a wonder we didn’t get food poisoning. Later we came back and picked around at the food. Sometimes we all had to sit down together for supper. After an unwritten length of time, we would pack up and go home – five miles away. It wasn’t like they had anything new to talk about. They saw each other several times a week.
There weren’t any toys so we grandkids had to make up games. I don’t remember any time that was particularly fun – mostly bickering that would evolve into fights. Then the adults would have to come separate us and give someone or all whippings.
Grandmother was diabetic in her later years. Dr. Waters knew she would “just a little taste” herself into too much and so he always upped her insulin for the holidays. There would be turkey with dressing, canned cranberry sauce and whole berry made from scratch, corn bread and biscuits, a ham and candied sweet potatoes and some orange pecan sweet potatoes. There would be some mostly iceberg lettuce with Thousand Island dressing. Sometimes there would be cold slaw, sauerkraut, and boiled cabbage. No, greens were not a popular fall thing in Oklahoma. There would be green beans, green bean casserole, and corn from the garden both on the cob and creamed corn. There was always a plate of home canned pickles, usually several varieties. There were usually some navy beans and baked beans (like we needed more gas) and certainly some sort of squash something. There may have been some noodle or rice casseroles. Biscuits and cornbread weren’t enough bread. They would add brown and server rolls and white bread. There were mashed potatoes, new potatoes, and canned peas. There sometimes was pea salad, carrot salad, and grape/cranberry salad. The Jell-O salads changed from year to year but someone always made orange Jell-O carrot salad that no one every ate or liked.
Then came the desserts. I remember Mother making an apple pecan cake every year. The banana nut cake got replace with a Scotch chocolate cake with pecan sugary icing. That was replaced with an Italian cocoanut pecan cream cake with cream cheese icing with pecans and cocoanut. Aunt Margie would make a cocoanut cake or chocolate cake or strawberry cake too. Mother wasn’t very good a piecrust but that didn’t stop her from making pies. When frozen crust became available at the stores that made it even easier. She made lemon meringue, chocolate, a really good cocoanut cream, banana cream, and one called Jefferson Davis chess pie. Sometimes she made pecan and pumpkin pies too. There were frequently chocolate chip and oatmeal cookies. Aunt Margie brought many of the same kinds. There was ice cream and whip cream (later cool whip).
One year Grandmother decided to make a pie. The sisters said she made them every year but had stopped when the diabetes came on. It was a butter chess pie – butter, eggs, and sugar. It was decadent – and really good. Mother and Daddy had to hand churn butter when they were growing up. They grew to hate the tasted and smell of butter immensely. They didn’t care for the taste of the butter pie so Grandmother never made it again. I was disappointed but it wasn’t like there wasn’t anything good to replace it.
All you can eat buffets have nothing on a Southern Oklahoma Thanksgiving dinner that shows influence of the tribal potlash ceremonies. There was this Italian Yankee at O.U. who tried to claim his Italian family gathering had an unbeatable spread, but he hadn’t been to one of my family’s holiday dinners. The “potlash” ceremony among farming tribes was a “being” by itself. They were such abundant holiday traditions.
So this year Doug was down in Florida with his family. Azure, Kyler, and Miko have moved away and so has Jeremy. I was going to be alone. Azure sent friends. The first came with a plate of food and the second brought a card and arrived while the first was still here. They left and a while later all of Jeremy’s siblings and girlfriends and cousins came bringing me some of Big Mamas Southern Soul Thanksgiving cooking. As they left another young man arrived. I gave him some pie and found out later that he had stayed home and not had any Thanksgiving dinner. I had a smoked breast and some cranberry sauce and the plate from Jeremy’s grandmother had enough for several meals that I could have shared had I known. I had a wonderful day. I didn’t have to cook but I still had a full dishwasher. I was pleasantly full and tired but so happy.
Thanksgiving memories and traditions – sometimes don’t change, but kids grow up, grandparents and parents pass away. The kids grow up and move away following their own life journey. Sometimes couples have to be apart. It’s sad when you spend Thanksgiving thinking about what was. It is more fun to make new traditions. I didn’t cook for days. I received some Thanksgiving dinner from other families without having too much leftover food along with dirty dishes, pots, and pans. I had a wonderful day. And next year? Well, we will see. It will be filled with some more New Traditions!
Monday, November 30, 2009
Praying When we are Grieving
by Katherine Ari, November 30, 2009
I have a large number of friends who have just lost loved ones in the last few months, especially in November. First, the former editor/owner of the hometown local newspaper passed away the same day as Michael Jackson. Farrah Fawcett, Ed McMahon, and Patrick Swayze died. These were all icons in their own way. Another hometown death was Aunt Dale. Most of us who grew up there know who she was and what she meant to her family as well as hundreds of other people over the many years.
One of my classmates had several ailing relatives dying at the same time. Another’s dad died. At our reunion a beautiful mom in her nineties joined us. She passed last week quite quickly
A couple of Sunday’s ago, a close friend was crying at church. He told me his dad had died the night before. And it has been only 3 weeks since another friend of 20 years out here in Douglasville had his mom pass away. Yesterday, at church again, I hugged a friend, David Michael. I can’t explain what I felt but I knew something just wasn’t right. “What’s going on?” He knew he couldn’t pretend with me. “My dad died last week,” he answered me.
My home girl, Gem, lost her father-in-law Thursday, Thanksgiving night. On Saturday, my class website posted that a classmate’s wife passed away after a battle with cancer. And when I got home from church, I checked the website and found classmate Stanley’s cancer had taken his life too. And a young friend had a break up and 2 deaths in his family, one a suicide. There are a few more that have happened in the last few weeks.
So many people I care about are grieving. I’ve been on that road. My parents have both passed – 10 and 11 years ago. Doug’s Grandmother Nordquist died at age 89. Then his other Grandpa Roy at 95 and Grandma Eva died as 99 in February of 2003. Later that year, the most devastating death of all happened when his 48-year-old sister died the day before Thanksgiving suddenly.
The thing is most of us have some sort of belief in an afterlife. Most of us believe that our loved ones and friends are met by those gone before them and that they are no longer in pain, going to a new and better life.
Many people say to pray for them and pray to get through the sorrow, the hard times, the pain and grief. Prayer, like God as we understand God, means different things to different people. The atheist, and there are some among us, finds no comfort for their grief in the idea of talking to a mythical bearded white skinned man out there in the clouds in the sky. But their pain and grief are just as real as the fundamentalist.
My minister and teacher, Paul, was at a city hall type meeting and was asked to say a prayer. He thought about it. Knowing there were many belief systems represented there, especially traditional Christians, how could he “pray” a prayer for everyone? He started with, “What do I know about God?” So in order to make a statement that is for everyone, I have started with what I know about God or Love.
I know there is a power for Good in the Universe. It is the force behind all of creation, the beginning point of all that exist. It is present everywhere in everything all the time. It is available for us to use in our lives. It does its work through us and how we choose to use it creates our personal experience of life. Even someone who choose not to believe in a supernatural being can see that there is something that is the beginning that sets things in motion. We all know that the stronger our faith and beliefs are that we can create anything. One can say it came from me, it came from God working through me, or it came from God outside of me. I personally call it Universal Energy or God but for me it is not a man God. I believe; therefore I use the power for Good and for Love.
Many of us are sad. Many feel loss. My classmate Stanley was quite a character. A book about him would be funny and inspirational, but I don’t think there would be space enough to say everything and really tell his whole story.
Grief is a personal experience. We are sad because the physical presence of the one who has passed is gone. We lose the moments of sharing time with them, looking at their smiling faces, feeling their love in the same room. A part of us has gone away forever. Life brings us all sorts of changes in our relationships. With death, the physical one on one relationship is over and you can’t get it back. We cry – but that really is okay!
We want to say in our prayer, “God, I miss my loved one so much. I know they are okay but it still hurts me. I miss them. I wasn’t ready for them to go! I wasn’t done yet needing them in my life.” And when you get to this point, you can keep crying, complaining, and lamenting. When you truly believe in this ultimate power for Good we call God, then after you have cried until you feel you can cry no more, BE STILL. Let the Love you know is God, is this Universal Force come into your consciousness, holding you, healing you, cradling and nurturing you, and carrying you through a hard part of existence. And if you are atheist and grieving, you do know love and how it feels, so think of feeling Love. The part of the person who has left us that we long for IS love. We may have to cry a while but the memories of the love and joy will not leave. Love is infinite, unlimited by time and space.
When Mother died and even now, when I open my heart to what I know is God, is Love, in its purest unconditional form, when I feel sorrow and tears flow once again, I can feel both Mother and Daddy with me holding me tenderly. I still miss the conversations about food on Thanksgiving and football discussions. I miss a card and small birthday check on November 22. I do not deny that memories and longing don’t enter my mind because they still pass through at times. And I hear, “I’m right here. Happy birthday!” It’s Daddy’s voice whispering to my inner soul ears.
I am grateful for the love of those who have moved on to another life. I am grateful for their lives and how they contributed to me, to my friends, and classmates. We have all been so fortunate to have each one in our life. I don’t say goodbye. I say, “See ya!”
Thank you for Love. I know I will heal, that I am healing, that I AM healed. God as I understand God is with each of us all the time. Love heals what causes the pain. Love is unlimited. Cry but let go of the anger, the judgments, the fear, any of that with each tear falling down your face. Let go. Let God. Let Love fill you and make you whole. Know that everywhere in your body where you feel some part of you is now missing is filled with Love and always is filled with whole, perfect, complete Love.
And that’s what I know about God and grief and Love. And so it is.
I have a large number of friends who have just lost loved ones in the last few months, especially in November. First, the former editor/owner of the hometown local newspaper passed away the same day as Michael Jackson. Farrah Fawcett, Ed McMahon, and Patrick Swayze died. These were all icons in their own way. Another hometown death was Aunt Dale. Most of us who grew up there know who she was and what she meant to her family as well as hundreds of other people over the many years.
One of my classmates had several ailing relatives dying at the same time. Another’s dad died. At our reunion a beautiful mom in her nineties joined us. She passed last week quite quickly
A couple of Sunday’s ago, a close friend was crying at church. He told me his dad had died the night before. And it has been only 3 weeks since another friend of 20 years out here in Douglasville had his mom pass away. Yesterday, at church again, I hugged a friend, David Michael. I can’t explain what I felt but I knew something just wasn’t right. “What’s going on?” He knew he couldn’t pretend with me. “My dad died last week,” he answered me.
My home girl, Gem, lost her father-in-law Thursday, Thanksgiving night. On Saturday, my class website posted that a classmate’s wife passed away after a battle with cancer. And when I got home from church, I checked the website and found classmate Stanley’s cancer had taken his life too. And a young friend had a break up and 2 deaths in his family, one a suicide. There are a few more that have happened in the last few weeks.
So many people I care about are grieving. I’ve been on that road. My parents have both passed – 10 and 11 years ago. Doug’s Grandmother Nordquist died at age 89. Then his other Grandpa Roy at 95 and Grandma Eva died as 99 in February of 2003. Later that year, the most devastating death of all happened when his 48-year-old sister died the day before Thanksgiving suddenly.
The thing is most of us have some sort of belief in an afterlife. Most of us believe that our loved ones and friends are met by those gone before them and that they are no longer in pain, going to a new and better life.
Many people say to pray for them and pray to get through the sorrow, the hard times, the pain and grief. Prayer, like God as we understand God, means different things to different people. The atheist, and there are some among us, finds no comfort for their grief in the idea of talking to a mythical bearded white skinned man out there in the clouds in the sky. But their pain and grief are just as real as the fundamentalist.
My minister and teacher, Paul, was at a city hall type meeting and was asked to say a prayer. He thought about it. Knowing there were many belief systems represented there, especially traditional Christians, how could he “pray” a prayer for everyone? He started with, “What do I know about God?” So in order to make a statement that is for everyone, I have started with what I know about God or Love.
I know there is a power for Good in the Universe. It is the force behind all of creation, the beginning point of all that exist. It is present everywhere in everything all the time. It is available for us to use in our lives. It does its work through us and how we choose to use it creates our personal experience of life. Even someone who choose not to believe in a supernatural being can see that there is something that is the beginning that sets things in motion. We all know that the stronger our faith and beliefs are that we can create anything. One can say it came from me, it came from God working through me, or it came from God outside of me. I personally call it Universal Energy or God but for me it is not a man God. I believe; therefore I use the power for Good and for Love.
Many of us are sad. Many feel loss. My classmate Stanley was quite a character. A book about him would be funny and inspirational, but I don’t think there would be space enough to say everything and really tell his whole story.
Grief is a personal experience. We are sad because the physical presence of the one who has passed is gone. We lose the moments of sharing time with them, looking at their smiling faces, feeling their love in the same room. A part of us has gone away forever. Life brings us all sorts of changes in our relationships. With death, the physical one on one relationship is over and you can’t get it back. We cry – but that really is okay!
We want to say in our prayer, “God, I miss my loved one so much. I know they are okay but it still hurts me. I miss them. I wasn’t ready for them to go! I wasn’t done yet needing them in my life.” And when you get to this point, you can keep crying, complaining, and lamenting. When you truly believe in this ultimate power for Good we call God, then after you have cried until you feel you can cry no more, BE STILL. Let the Love you know is God, is this Universal Force come into your consciousness, holding you, healing you, cradling and nurturing you, and carrying you through a hard part of existence. And if you are atheist and grieving, you do know love and how it feels, so think of feeling Love. The part of the person who has left us that we long for IS love. We may have to cry a while but the memories of the love and joy will not leave. Love is infinite, unlimited by time and space.
When Mother died and even now, when I open my heart to what I know is God, is Love, in its purest unconditional form, when I feel sorrow and tears flow once again, I can feel both Mother and Daddy with me holding me tenderly. I still miss the conversations about food on Thanksgiving and football discussions. I miss a card and small birthday check on November 22. I do not deny that memories and longing don’t enter my mind because they still pass through at times. And I hear, “I’m right here. Happy birthday!” It’s Daddy’s voice whispering to my inner soul ears.
I am grateful for the love of those who have moved on to another life. I am grateful for their lives and how they contributed to me, to my friends, and classmates. We have all been so fortunate to have each one in our life. I don’t say goodbye. I say, “See ya!”
Thank you for Love. I know I will heal, that I am healing, that I AM healed. God as I understand God is with each of us all the time. Love heals what causes the pain. Love is unlimited. Cry but let go of the anger, the judgments, the fear, any of that with each tear falling down your face. Let go. Let God. Let Love fill you and make you whole. Know that everywhere in your body where you feel some part of you is now missing is filled with Love and always is filled with whole, perfect, complete Love.
And that’s what I know about God and grief and Love. And so it is.
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
“God is Love.”
[The following is a treatment submitted to Holiday Treatments for the Soul, a small publication by the Spiritual Living Center of Atlanta of Treatments by our Practitioners and Interns and Ministers. It will come out in December probably.]
God is Love. Love is God. Love - God is omnipresent all the time but during the Holidays even the non-religious person turns their focus towards Love as it physically manifest in family and friends. I am excited to embrace the feelings of this season because no other time during the year is there so much potential to feel the Love of God through others. There is only One Love. It’s all One Power. What do I know about the Holidays and Love? I know what I always know. God is Love and it manifests in physical form through me as Love, Joy, Health, Peace, and Prosperity. I see Love in everyone behind the shopping, the packages, and the false stress on the surface. The truth is Love.
Everywhere I go, everyone I see, everything I do has Love, is Love. So much Joy fills my heart I have to give it to others. There is nothing but Love in my heart now through the Holiday Season. I am so grateful for this wonderful feeling in and around me. It fills me up and there is no room for anything else.
With these words, I give their meaning to the universe and walk in a world of Infinite Love. So it is.
Katherine Wheelus Dannels
God is Love. Love is God. Love - God is omnipresent all the time but during the Holidays even the non-religious person turns their focus towards Love as it physically manifest in family and friends. I am excited to embrace the feelings of this season because no other time during the year is there so much potential to feel the Love of God through others. There is only One Love. It’s all One Power. What do I know about the Holidays and Love? I know what I always know. God is Love and it manifests in physical form through me as Love, Joy, Health, Peace, and Prosperity. I see Love in everyone behind the shopping, the packages, and the false stress on the surface. The truth is Love.
Everywhere I go, everyone I see, everything I do has Love, is Love. So much Joy fills my heart I have to give it to others. There is nothing but Love in my heart now through the Holiday Season. I am so grateful for this wonderful feeling in and around me. It fills me up and there is no room for anything else.
With these words, I give their meaning to the universe and walk in a world of Infinite Love. So it is.
Katherine Wheelus Dannels
Why Do Some People Have to Have Someone to Hate?
by Katherine Ari, November 17, 2009
On the Internet news, Ian McClellan, the actor, admitted that he rips out pages in hotel Bibles about homosexuality. His actions are what they are. There are many things in the old testament of the Bible that are really offensive. If a woman is in her monthly menses and sits on a bench or pew in the temple or church, she is to be stoned and anyone who sits where she sat is unclean and also should be stoned. There is something in one of the Old Testament books about divorcing and one shoe – really silly if you are going to take the Bible literally. Then there is the scripture that says if you go into another community and they do not have the same god as Jehovah, you are to kill, stone, and castrate the people. Let’s see how far anyone gets taking that literally.
But it is the fundamental Christians, followers of the New Testament, that are screaming and condemning homosexuality the most. They will even say they don’t like the Old Testament because of the killing and castrating stuff and really don’t spend much time reading those stories. But they pick out this page and interpret as a justification to hate homosexuality.
I am not sure whether this one is old or new – "If thy right eye offends thee, pluck it out. If thy right hand offends thee, cut it off" – but how many people can take that one literally? Not many, because if they did, there would be a very large group of Christians and non-Christians with only one eye and one hand and they would be sent to mental hospitals for hurting themselves. And we can even leave lust and sex off of the offensive actions of eyes and hand. Just eating something that is harmful to your body or drinking alcohol that destroys brain cells are offensive acts.
Jesus says, “If someone comes to your door and you turn them away, you are turning him away. If you turn your back on the prisoner in jail, you turn you back on him (Jesus).” And I believe with my inner soul that if Jesus as I know Jesus were to walk into the jail to see those who have made mistakes and have fallen short of the glory of God, he would not scream at them and tell them they were going to Hell for their mistakes. He would not be ugly, angry, or unloving to them. He would not be going to jail to make a point of their mistakes. The Jesus I grew up loving would show love to them. Even the stories of him on the cross next to the others that were criminals tell us of his love for them and his forgiveness.
I am not sitting in judgment – after all Jesus also said, “Let you among us who is without sin (missing the mark) throw the first stone” because no one is without sin. Even if homosexuality is a “sin” (I don’t think so) it is just another sin and Jesus would NOT act the way the religious right acts. WHY do Christians always have to have a group to hate? WHY?
Why do homosexuals want to get married? They simply want to be treated the same and regarded the same as everyone else.
After World War II, the “hated group” was communist. Society feared and hated Germans, Japanese, and “Commies”. The Klu Klux Klan hated black people and Jews all in the name of Christianity. Then the USSR fell and the wall in Berlin came down. Civil Rights were supported by whites as well as African Americans and the KKK was revealed as what it was.
Then the religious right went after the “New Agers” – a work of the devil. If you went into a Christian bookstore, there was a whole shelf of condemning books about their definition of New Agers full of hate, anger, and misconstrued ideas by people that just looked for something to fault. New Age was just a marketing term and NEVER any one kind of people. Anything that some Christians thought was different or against their beliefs were New Age and the Devils work.
I remember so clearly another parent at the Christian school that my sons briefly attended saying that she wouldn’t ever vote for Bill Clinton because he wasn’t a Christian because he didn’t believe in the death penalty and did believe in abortions. I thought to myself that I know many Christians who do not believe in the death penalty and DO believe in the right to choose. But her definition of Christianity included this slant. So many things in the so-called New Age beliefs were considered as non-Christian by some and not so by others. But they preached and condemned and judged and call names and got ugly. Again Jesus would not act that way. He wouldn’t.
The phase of bracelets and signs and billboards of “What Would Jesus Do?” or WWJD was really a good idea. Unfortunately, people wearing those bracelets justified those judgmental attitudes and mean hateful behaviors. They believed Jesus would do that. I don’t!
The anti-New Agers furor died down as any metaphysical group distanced themselves from the term. The occult groups, the Pagan, or Wiccans, distanced from those terms too. The Christians hating – an oxymoron, don’t you think? – needed a new group to go after. (I just don’t understand why.) Homosexuals are tired of the bigotry and being treated like they are second-class citizens. They want to be allowed to marry and have all the rights of other couples. But the vocal ones that find a passage in the Bible to justify their unkind attitudes and beliefs speak out against them, condemning their lifestyle, acting like someone made them God. But I am not God. And I don’t have the right to judge either. If the Jesus I believed I knew as a girl growing up in the Baptist church, (though Baptist is not my spiritual home today) were standing with me right now, with my gay friends, and my straight friends, we would all feel Love, complete Love, unconditional Love, infinite Love. May each of us think every thought, take every actions, and do anything we do with anyone we come in contact with as if Jesus or God, however we interpret the Divine Presence, is standing with us with every breath we take. For I know we all my heart and soul that Peace would be on earth if everyone lived their lives with this practice in their life.
Take a moment now and imagine that your interpretation of God or the sons or daughters of God are in front of you with open arms and looking you in the eye. Don’t you feel it – Love - too? What Would He/She do if you turned toward another and then gave them hate and condemnation? Personally, I think if you turned back to look in the eyes of the Divine presence you would see tears.
On the Internet news, Ian McClellan, the actor, admitted that he rips out pages in hotel Bibles about homosexuality. His actions are what they are. There are many things in the old testament of the Bible that are really offensive. If a woman is in her monthly menses and sits on a bench or pew in the temple or church, she is to be stoned and anyone who sits where she sat is unclean and also should be stoned. There is something in one of the Old Testament books about divorcing and one shoe – really silly if you are going to take the Bible literally. Then there is the scripture that says if you go into another community and they do not have the same god as Jehovah, you are to kill, stone, and castrate the people. Let’s see how far anyone gets taking that literally.
But it is the fundamental Christians, followers of the New Testament, that are screaming and condemning homosexuality the most. They will even say they don’t like the Old Testament because of the killing and castrating stuff and really don’t spend much time reading those stories. But they pick out this page and interpret as a justification to hate homosexuality.
I am not sure whether this one is old or new – "If thy right eye offends thee, pluck it out. If thy right hand offends thee, cut it off" – but how many people can take that one literally? Not many, because if they did, there would be a very large group of Christians and non-Christians with only one eye and one hand and they would be sent to mental hospitals for hurting themselves. And we can even leave lust and sex off of the offensive actions of eyes and hand. Just eating something that is harmful to your body or drinking alcohol that destroys brain cells are offensive acts.
Jesus says, “If someone comes to your door and you turn them away, you are turning him away. If you turn your back on the prisoner in jail, you turn you back on him (Jesus).” And I believe with my inner soul that if Jesus as I know Jesus were to walk into the jail to see those who have made mistakes and have fallen short of the glory of God, he would not scream at them and tell them they were going to Hell for their mistakes. He would not be ugly, angry, or unloving to them. He would not be going to jail to make a point of their mistakes. The Jesus I grew up loving would show love to them. Even the stories of him on the cross next to the others that were criminals tell us of his love for them and his forgiveness.
I am not sitting in judgment – after all Jesus also said, “Let you among us who is without sin (missing the mark) throw the first stone” because no one is without sin. Even if homosexuality is a “sin” (I don’t think so) it is just another sin and Jesus would NOT act the way the religious right acts. WHY do Christians always have to have a group to hate? WHY?
Why do homosexuals want to get married? They simply want to be treated the same and regarded the same as everyone else.
After World War II, the “hated group” was communist. Society feared and hated Germans, Japanese, and “Commies”. The Klu Klux Klan hated black people and Jews all in the name of Christianity. Then the USSR fell and the wall in Berlin came down. Civil Rights were supported by whites as well as African Americans and the KKK was revealed as what it was.
Then the religious right went after the “New Agers” – a work of the devil. If you went into a Christian bookstore, there was a whole shelf of condemning books about their definition of New Agers full of hate, anger, and misconstrued ideas by people that just looked for something to fault. New Age was just a marketing term and NEVER any one kind of people. Anything that some Christians thought was different or against their beliefs were New Age and the Devils work.
I remember so clearly another parent at the Christian school that my sons briefly attended saying that she wouldn’t ever vote for Bill Clinton because he wasn’t a Christian because he didn’t believe in the death penalty and did believe in abortions. I thought to myself that I know many Christians who do not believe in the death penalty and DO believe in the right to choose. But her definition of Christianity included this slant. So many things in the so-called New Age beliefs were considered as non-Christian by some and not so by others. But they preached and condemned and judged and call names and got ugly. Again Jesus would not act that way. He wouldn’t.
The phase of bracelets and signs and billboards of “What Would Jesus Do?” or WWJD was really a good idea. Unfortunately, people wearing those bracelets justified those judgmental attitudes and mean hateful behaviors. They believed Jesus would do that. I don’t!
The anti-New Agers furor died down as any metaphysical group distanced themselves from the term. The occult groups, the Pagan, or Wiccans, distanced from those terms too. The Christians hating – an oxymoron, don’t you think? – needed a new group to go after. (I just don’t understand why.) Homosexuals are tired of the bigotry and being treated like they are second-class citizens. They want to be allowed to marry and have all the rights of other couples. But the vocal ones that find a passage in the Bible to justify their unkind attitudes and beliefs speak out against them, condemning their lifestyle, acting like someone made them God. But I am not God. And I don’t have the right to judge either. If the Jesus I believed I knew as a girl growing up in the Baptist church, (though Baptist is not my spiritual home today) were standing with me right now, with my gay friends, and my straight friends, we would all feel Love, complete Love, unconditional Love, infinite Love. May each of us think every thought, take every actions, and do anything we do with anyone we come in contact with as if Jesus or God, however we interpret the Divine Presence, is standing with us with every breath we take. For I know we all my heart and soul that Peace would be on earth if everyone lived their lives with this practice in their life.
Take a moment now and imagine that your interpretation of God or the sons or daughters of God are in front of you with open arms and looking you in the eye. Don’t you feel it – Love - too? What Would He/She do if you turned toward another and then gave them hate and condemnation? Personally, I think if you turned back to look in the eyes of the Divine presence you would see tears.
What’s In A Name?
November 17, 2009
by Katherine Ari
I was named Mary Katherine when I was born. Most of my life I have been called Kathy. I always preferred Mary to be pronounced Marie. A few years ago while doing a regression therapy, I came to recognize that not Marie but Ari was the name I was drawn too. What Ari means is another story.
Over the years I have read about the meanings of names. Certainly numerology is about your NAME more than your birthday like Astrology. I could see myself as Katherine, a renaissance person like the queen. I am a person of many talents and always independent. But the name Mary is the universal mother, the mother of God or Jesus, always the mother. I did not want to be Mary. I resisted the image of “Mother Earth” though often others tried to say that was how they saw me. “No, no, no! I don’t want to be that.” I would answer.
I didn’t marry until I was 29. For most of my twenties I didn’t have any desire to marry much less become a mother. My astrology teacher in my masters degree program taught us to do charts and in my fourth house I either would not have children or have no trouble with children. That was ironic in itself because by then I was married and pregnant with my first child. The spiritual action of marriage had also brought about the biological urge to have children – though even to this day I am not really a baby person. I went on to have three children and we have an unofficially adopted son making it four. I would have had another but Doug said no.
We had our children and made a life in an old house in Douglasville, GA. The house was surrounded by numerous kinds of oak trees, elms, sweet gums, pines, apples, cedars, a redbud and a dogwood, a mimosa, and we tried peaches. I have always loved trees. I spent my childhood having trees as my only friends along with my cat living in the country without any other children for neighbors. I felt a bond and communication with them even when I didn’t understand I was communicating with them and they with me. I do not deny that I have hugged many a tree, cried under many a tree and let them help me with my pain, danced with them, and heard them cry when they were damaged or cut down.
Years ago when the children were young, we were doing some work with a Native American teacher. He taught me that each area of the forest or even our yard has a head tree. There are grandmother and grandfather trees. He challenged me to go around in my yard and determine which was the head tree. The head tree is not necessarily the oldest or the biggest but I would discover that there are different kinds of leaders among the trees. Each tree in a yard has a function that forms a little sub-ecosystem. On my own I learned how to tell the feminine vs. the masculine trees.
I know you are asking, “What does this part of the story have to do with names?” Keep reading.
On one side of my house in the driveway is a water oak, a 110-year-old Grandfather Oak. At that time, there was a red oak, a 200 year old Great Grandmother Oak on the other side of the house, the west side. In the middle of the back yard was another Grandmother oak. The two oaks on each side of my house were guardians of the house and I felt that the red oak was the head tree. I went to the other grandmother oak in the yard and I looked at her. I said you just want to be the tree that provides shade and love. You don’t want to be the “mother” of the yard, the grand - mother. And I felt she agreed with me.
One morning in 1991, I went outside with my little Maltese dog. The sky was very unusual. There was a storm coming in from Birmingham but the sun had just come up from the east. The colors were vivid, strange. Spring flowers were coming up in an area that was garbage when we moved to the house in 1984. Everything looked so pretty. I spoke to the Great Grandmother, the mother tree of the yard where all the baby birds and squirrels lived. “Grand-mother, you are so wonderful and beautiful this morning. I love you so much. I hope you will be with us for another hundred years!”
As clear as if someone were standing right in front of me I heard a voice say, “I’m leaving soon.” A rush of fear passed over me. “Where did that voice come from?” I looked at her and I knew, KNEW it came from the tree. “Oh no, I hope not. We want you around for a long time. We love you so much and you are so important to us!”
“Soon, Granddaughter, very soon.” This internal voice coming to me was so real and sad. I felt tears well up in my eyes but then I went on about walking the dog and returning inside the house.
I went back toward the bedroom to get dressed. It was about 8:30 a.m. and Doug came running through the house. “This storm looks really bad. We should move to the hallway – quickly!” We got the kids up, grabbed the inside dog. The wind was loud and strong. Two tornados were passing over our house and we heard a large boom. The house shook and then we heard rain running into the house. The shaking was over and all we heard was loud rain. We got up to look where the rain was coming in. “Oh my God, the red oak was not there. She had gone down. But when she fell, she went north and wrapped around the back of the house. Twelve other trees went down on our property, all going towards the east, the direction of the tornado. But if she had done that, she would have fallen directly on the house, destroying the house and killing all of us.
“She told me, Doug. She said she was leaving soon,” I told Doug as I cried. Wow, she told me. I heard her. She told me! I felt like I had lost someone dear.
I felt she was the leader of my yard and she was gone. There was a young oak that I thought would be the new leader of that side of the yard some day, but when she fell, he held her until the tree people could get her safely to the ground without hitting the house. He was damaged beyond repair and a few years later fell to another storm.
I was well settled into parenthood and home schooling my children. I loved being their parent and had even gotten to the point of liking other children. I was walking around the yard and I felt that the Grandmother Oak in the middle of the yard had changed. She was clearly the new feminine head tree in the yard. Feeling sure of myself and like I “knew” the truth I said, “Well, Grandmother, I see you have assumed the role of the mother of the yard now since the Great Grandmother is gone.”
With a gentle bit firm voice she spoke to me. “It was not me that was not ready to be the mother, granddaughter. I am now what I was then.” And as if she and I were saying it in unison, the next thought to come through my mind was, “It was me that was not ready to be the mother, the earth mother. And now I am ready. I am ready to embrace being Mary, the eternal mother. I WAS Mary. I am Mary – (but I am even more Ari). But that IS another story and the name means something different.
What does your name mean? Do you embrace it and live the full potential?
by Katherine Ari
I was named Mary Katherine when I was born. Most of my life I have been called Kathy. I always preferred Mary to be pronounced Marie. A few years ago while doing a regression therapy, I came to recognize that not Marie but Ari was the name I was drawn too. What Ari means is another story.
Over the years I have read about the meanings of names. Certainly numerology is about your NAME more than your birthday like Astrology. I could see myself as Katherine, a renaissance person like the queen. I am a person of many talents and always independent. But the name Mary is the universal mother, the mother of God or Jesus, always the mother. I did not want to be Mary. I resisted the image of “Mother Earth” though often others tried to say that was how they saw me. “No, no, no! I don’t want to be that.” I would answer.
I didn’t marry until I was 29. For most of my twenties I didn’t have any desire to marry much less become a mother. My astrology teacher in my masters degree program taught us to do charts and in my fourth house I either would not have children or have no trouble with children. That was ironic in itself because by then I was married and pregnant with my first child. The spiritual action of marriage had also brought about the biological urge to have children – though even to this day I am not really a baby person. I went on to have three children and we have an unofficially adopted son making it four. I would have had another but Doug said no.
We had our children and made a life in an old house in Douglasville, GA. The house was surrounded by numerous kinds of oak trees, elms, sweet gums, pines, apples, cedars, a redbud and a dogwood, a mimosa, and we tried peaches. I have always loved trees. I spent my childhood having trees as my only friends along with my cat living in the country without any other children for neighbors. I felt a bond and communication with them even when I didn’t understand I was communicating with them and they with me. I do not deny that I have hugged many a tree, cried under many a tree and let them help me with my pain, danced with them, and heard them cry when they were damaged or cut down.
Years ago when the children were young, we were doing some work with a Native American teacher. He taught me that each area of the forest or even our yard has a head tree. There are grandmother and grandfather trees. He challenged me to go around in my yard and determine which was the head tree. The head tree is not necessarily the oldest or the biggest but I would discover that there are different kinds of leaders among the trees. Each tree in a yard has a function that forms a little sub-ecosystem. On my own I learned how to tell the feminine vs. the masculine trees.
I know you are asking, “What does this part of the story have to do with names?” Keep reading.
On one side of my house in the driveway is a water oak, a 110-year-old Grandfather Oak. At that time, there was a red oak, a 200 year old Great Grandmother Oak on the other side of the house, the west side. In the middle of the back yard was another Grandmother oak. The two oaks on each side of my house were guardians of the house and I felt that the red oak was the head tree. I went to the other grandmother oak in the yard and I looked at her. I said you just want to be the tree that provides shade and love. You don’t want to be the “mother” of the yard, the grand - mother. And I felt she agreed with me.
One morning in 1991, I went outside with my little Maltese dog. The sky was very unusual. There was a storm coming in from Birmingham but the sun had just come up from the east. The colors were vivid, strange. Spring flowers were coming up in an area that was garbage when we moved to the house in 1984. Everything looked so pretty. I spoke to the Great Grandmother, the mother tree of the yard where all the baby birds and squirrels lived. “Grand-mother, you are so wonderful and beautiful this morning. I love you so much. I hope you will be with us for another hundred years!”
As clear as if someone were standing right in front of me I heard a voice say, “I’m leaving soon.” A rush of fear passed over me. “Where did that voice come from?” I looked at her and I knew, KNEW it came from the tree. “Oh no, I hope not. We want you around for a long time. We love you so much and you are so important to us!”
“Soon, Granddaughter, very soon.” This internal voice coming to me was so real and sad. I felt tears well up in my eyes but then I went on about walking the dog and returning inside the house.
I went back toward the bedroom to get dressed. It was about 8:30 a.m. and Doug came running through the house. “This storm looks really bad. We should move to the hallway – quickly!” We got the kids up, grabbed the inside dog. The wind was loud and strong. Two tornados were passing over our house and we heard a large boom. The house shook and then we heard rain running into the house. The shaking was over and all we heard was loud rain. We got up to look where the rain was coming in. “Oh my God, the red oak was not there. She had gone down. But when she fell, she went north and wrapped around the back of the house. Twelve other trees went down on our property, all going towards the east, the direction of the tornado. But if she had done that, she would have fallen directly on the house, destroying the house and killing all of us.
“She told me, Doug. She said she was leaving soon,” I told Doug as I cried. Wow, she told me. I heard her. She told me! I felt like I had lost someone dear.
I felt she was the leader of my yard and she was gone. There was a young oak that I thought would be the new leader of that side of the yard some day, but when she fell, he held her until the tree people could get her safely to the ground without hitting the house. He was damaged beyond repair and a few years later fell to another storm.
I was well settled into parenthood and home schooling my children. I loved being their parent and had even gotten to the point of liking other children. I was walking around the yard and I felt that the Grandmother Oak in the middle of the yard had changed. She was clearly the new feminine head tree in the yard. Feeling sure of myself and like I “knew” the truth I said, “Well, Grandmother, I see you have assumed the role of the mother of the yard now since the Great Grandmother is gone.”
With a gentle bit firm voice she spoke to me. “It was not me that was not ready to be the mother, granddaughter. I am now what I was then.” And as if she and I were saying it in unison, the next thought to come through my mind was, “It was me that was not ready to be the mother, the earth mother. And now I am ready. I am ready to embrace being Mary, the eternal mother. I WAS Mary. I am Mary – (but I am even more Ari). But that IS another story and the name means something different.
What does your name mean? Do you embrace it and live the full potential?
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
RANDOM THOUGHTS AND LESSONS FOR TODAY by Katherine Ari
RANDOM THOUGHTS AND LESSONS FOR TODAY
Today is Wednesday, October 28, 2009 and I have not blogged since Oct. 15. The reason is Life got in the way – We had some pond improvement work. It was a challenging job and the customer seemed to be expecting us to rip him off or not do what we promised. By the time we finished, Doug and I had worked for little more than minimum wage. Something we usually find to be rewarding work became tiresome and dreaded. But it is my policy to look for the good in everything and for what was learned.
I learned that no matter how much someone likes to go on verbal word that you need to have things in writing and with lots of details. No matter how much you need some work and income, make sure there is a written lists of exactly what is expected. Inform customers of your company policies and maybe why you have them. Every time we have cut corners to please the client, we have regretted it. People get confused. They think they have said everything that is on their mind but that is not always the case. If you have it in writing, then they can look over the list and add on BEFORE you begin. If they want more, write it all down and just what is involved in their requests.
There is no doubt that as we “mature” our brains get filled up. I won’t say Senior Moments but that we just have minds full of lots of facts and figures. Sometimes things get pushed to the back of the pile. The next thing you know you are doing a lot of things that are not included in the bid. We don’t like to add on to estimates and I usually estimate a little high to account for unexpected issues. When you work with nature, it is really hard to predict just how long it will take to do something. People who are used to working with manmade materials and supplies don’t always understand that part of a job.
It all made us realize that we need a better idea about how to produce income. I want to work one on one with people seeking to improve their lives. I love people and seeing them unfold in their own empowerment. I have a wonderful office in our garden and no matter how much Doug complains about all the work, he really enjoys using his restlessness or hyperactivity to work on our garden. It is NOT about getting money but working doing the things I love most.
I also love writing – not just these blogs but writing my stories. I love painting. While we were finishing the pond job, the local Cultural Arts Center representative called to ask the Dannels family to produce an art show sometime next year, maybe April. Kyler, my son, and Doug, my husband, were in their National Juried Show last year and Kyler won the trustee award. My other children and my mother-in-law are also artists. We will put our best work together to show in the spring. Kyler also encourages his dad to put together his sculpture in bodies of work to present to galleries in Santa Fe. It is time for Doug Dannels to do what he really loves most – claim his incredible art and let the world see it.
I know we did a good job this week. I know that we did more than what we were paid for and that is okay. The customer seemed to be expecting to get ripped off and didn’t trust us but we did everything we thought he wanted with limited materials. It’s all good!
Today is Wednesday, October 28, 2009 and I have not blogged since Oct. 15. The reason is Life got in the way – We had some pond improvement work. It was a challenging job and the customer seemed to be expecting us to rip him off or not do what we promised. By the time we finished, Doug and I had worked for little more than minimum wage. Something we usually find to be rewarding work became tiresome and dreaded. But it is my policy to look for the good in everything and for what was learned.
I learned that no matter how much someone likes to go on verbal word that you need to have things in writing and with lots of details. No matter how much you need some work and income, make sure there is a written lists of exactly what is expected. Inform customers of your company policies and maybe why you have them. Every time we have cut corners to please the client, we have regretted it. People get confused. They think they have said everything that is on their mind but that is not always the case. If you have it in writing, then they can look over the list and add on BEFORE you begin. If they want more, write it all down and just what is involved in their requests.
There is no doubt that as we “mature” our brains get filled up. I won’t say Senior Moments but that we just have minds full of lots of facts and figures. Sometimes things get pushed to the back of the pile. The next thing you know you are doing a lot of things that are not included in the bid. We don’t like to add on to estimates and I usually estimate a little high to account for unexpected issues. When you work with nature, it is really hard to predict just how long it will take to do something. People who are used to working with manmade materials and supplies don’t always understand that part of a job.
It all made us realize that we need a better idea about how to produce income. I want to work one on one with people seeking to improve their lives. I love people and seeing them unfold in their own empowerment. I have a wonderful office in our garden and no matter how much Doug complains about all the work, he really enjoys using his restlessness or hyperactivity to work on our garden. It is NOT about getting money but working doing the things I love most.
I also love writing – not just these blogs but writing my stories. I love painting. While we were finishing the pond job, the local Cultural Arts Center representative called to ask the Dannels family to produce an art show sometime next year, maybe April. Kyler, my son, and Doug, my husband, were in their National Juried Show last year and Kyler won the trustee award. My other children and my mother-in-law are also artists. We will put our best work together to show in the spring. Kyler also encourages his dad to put together his sculpture in bodies of work to present to galleries in Santa Fe. It is time for Doug Dannels to do what he really loves most – claim his incredible art and let the world see it.
I know we did a good job this week. I know that we did more than what we were paid for and that is okay. The customer seemed to be expecting to get ripped off and didn’t trust us but we did everything we thought he wanted with limited materials. It’s all good!
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